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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
Shedding tears
Distant minds,
Don't look at me,
I'm fine.
Overlooking
All the blues.
All the times,
Not having clues.
Turning blues
Into red,
Freshly cuts,
Doesn't fade.
All the reds
Never turn to pink.
Empty finger,
No band no ring.
Debating
Red to black?
Way too hard,
Courage's lack.
Distant minds
Not a tear.
Pushin' daisies,
Without fear.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2020
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
Wanted to see a little bit of light,
All the nights
That I've stayed up,
They are enough
To fill my cup.
Right?
Wanted to have someone to talk to,
I don't know,
If I leave them
Or they let go
Of me.
Wanted to be everything that
They wanted me to be,
And somehow I lost
Who I'm supposed to be.
Wanted to have what others own.
Instead of looking forward to
What I could've won.
Wanted too much
Of everything I couldn't get.
Wanted too much the things I couldn't get.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2020
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
Closed doors
Empty shores,
Doesn’t numb me
Not anymore.
Closed doors
Silence roars,
Hasn’t changed
Since I was four.
Closed doors
More and more,
I don’t want it
Not anymore.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2020
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
We are like Mark and C,
Words are tactile in our place,
A space where silence doesn't roar.
Eros has his home in here,
The world speak highly of our lore.
We took time to unwind,
We're the introverted kinds.
Mutualism is the word I'd use,
To describe the state of our minds.
We are similar than it seems.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2020
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
You were supposed to love me,
Unconditionally.
Called the hotline,
I'll be fine.
Wait for the "someday",
Surely the sun will shine.
I just want a new life.
Way away from yours, mother.
Why do you hate me anyways?
Did you forget who created me?
I didn't mean to be this way,
The way I am today,
You forced me to be.
I tried your visions on me,
You know, you saw it too.
I saw, you weren't happy
Or proud ; just made me
Feel like a fool.
Mother,
I wanted to live, you know.
To honour the life you gave me,
But you took it many times too.
I promise, I love the sound
That makes when the word
"Mother" is said ; I just,
I can't see you this way.
I promise I've tried to,
Way more times than I'd ever admit.
More times than I should have.
I'm sorry, mother, forgive me.
I really tried to forgive you,
But I've failed, you failed me.
I mothered me better than you.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2021
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
I've been sneezing since June from the dust.
I took bupropion with mountain dew-
Now I can't sleep, my heart is beating fast,
I'm a little dizzy and a bit nauseous.
Vesta told me not to lose my head
But I was having so much fun!
I couldn't find Hera or Venus
But Herne told me there's no harm.
All their lights are big and bright-
Their ichor is burning my skin.
All the stories that never started,
These are heartaches on the big screen.
Dislocation of emotions-
No one to blame, I did it to myself.
I keep seeing what isn't there,
In my head I always paint them well.
Since I can't find mine, I can't let you in-
Dear Eros, I hope you have your key.
If I could go back to the day we met-
Even with hindsight, I won't leave them be.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2021
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
You made me feel less lonely,
Sane in a sense.
I'm making new friends now-
I forgot all my made up ones names.
It's not that I'm missing you.
I'm really not, just so you know.
The best thing to ever happen to me-
I just walked out and closed the door.
On days like these or honestly in any case-
You're the one I would run to.
You were one of my favourite places,
I think I still love loving you.
I look for you everywhere I go,
Haven't spoken to you in over a full moon.
You look so pretty right now-
I don't remember when I last saw you.
I don't want to ask you,
"Why didn't you look for me?"
The answer's within the question-
I can't upset my identity.
The times you said you like talking to me-
Were you just trying to be nice?
Did you figure I don't deserve your time?
Am I crazy or it was all lies?
The first rain of the season,
Wasn't enough to wash my recollections.
About one of our past moments-
The night I asked about limitations.
Have you already forgotten about us?
Or are you still trying like me?
I was surprised when you told me to go-
Even though I went to tell you I'm leaving.
You're mostly all I write about still,
I can't help it, I promise-
I never imagined you meant this
When you said I was hard to miss.
I haven't been crying over this.
This is something I'm very used to-
In all the midnight conversations,
I will always think back to you.
It's not like I've never liked anyone,
But I've never craved them before.
I understand you're not what I need,
I'm sorry for asking more-
Do I ever cross your mind?
You're lucky if I don't, It'll pass if I do-
If we can keep this up,
We'll be strangers in a month or two.
You're not interested, why still am I?
My head is screaming "get a grip!"
I've tried everything, you know, I told you-
You warned me not to fall but still, I slipped.
The miserable part about this is
You know I want you to read this first-
These are my last few months as a teen,
I think you'll remain my favourite crush.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2022
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
He listens to my favourite band,
It was one of the first things we talked about-
It was one of the first things I liked about him.
I feel like I know him,
His hands look familiar to me, I feel like I know them-
Could they be the one I've been seeing in my dreams?
I don't know yet but
He feels like the ocean I wanna drown in-
Find more ways to indulge in and write hymns.
He's so very refreshing,
I haven't found any red flags so far-
Could be due to the butterflies, atleast that what it seems.
Paranoia and C-PTSD
Are making me ask myself-
Have I ever allowed anyone to have this much power over me?
I'm losing myself completely,
I think I just found my younger self-
He reminds me of the poems I wrote before I even met him.
Cernunnos is asking me to stay,
He is telling me to hold on-
I'm bored already, I told him, "slow burns aren't really my thing."
I'm happy with where I am now,
But I don't even know where I really want to be-
Kinda don't even wanna know, I'm better than I've ever been.
Taking my heart shaped sunglasses off,
To cherish the ride up to north, I won't mind if it hurts when I fall-
I feel like I'm on wellbutrin.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2021
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
Yes mother, I'm aware.
"Three headed dog's ahead,
Beware!"
Yes mother, I'll be back in summer
(Unfortunately),
Never want Gaea to freeze because of me.
I- maybe I wanted this, mother,
Goddess of vegetation, remember?
I- maybe I knew about the "food rule"
Or I maybe like the underworld better?
But, mother- Cerberus loves me,
Besides, it's Thanatos who kills.
"Bringer of death" is the only one,
Before whom the ruler kneels.
It's not what you think it is
Mother, maybe it's just-
The half of it.
I'm both Gaea and the great chaos mother,
Spring in hell, is only the start of it.
You'll see the gold dipped roses,
If you just open your eyes mother.
Now return the crocodile their tears,
I'll get back from home in the summer.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2021
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Diya Dutta Roy Poem
The problem is in our upbringing,
We were told, "the only pretty is pale".
It's the fault of our upbringing,
We measure beauty in colour scale.
Why does he even like her?
She's ugly (she's dark).
Tree's beauty is in it's flower,
Not in the colour of it's bark.
Now we teach "only fair is fair".
We don't even know the cure.
Well, you don't even care
'Cause you're "the superior".
Tip of iecberg, the root lies deep.
Nobody talks to me, "I'm a tad too brown".
If he fails, "he's the black sheep".
"Only white girls deserves the crown".
The problem is in our upbringing,
But we still can try and change.
Diversity is the part of our upbringing,
Forty shades in a foundation range.
Copyright © Diya Dutta Roy | Year Posted 2020
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