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Matthew Brend Poem
When I look in the mirror I hardly recognize the person staring back.
I’ve come so far but at what cost?
I’ve gone through so much
My heart is bruised and battered
My mind is twisted and filled with demons
Pain seems to follow me as if it's my own shadow.
I’m no longer the innocent little boy I once was
I’ve learned to not run from how I feel
I’ve learned that hiding behind the walls I’ve built can push people who care about you away.
I’ve learned you can’t force something that isn’t meant to be
I’ve learned that life is full of hardships that want to break you down
These lessons have shaped the person that stares back at me in the mirror.
Without these lessons I never would have grown
I wouldn’t have been able to realize what was in front of me
I was blind for so long.
You took the blindfold from my eyes and showed me that there’s more
You saved my heart from crumbling beyond repair
You saved my mind from falling prey to the demons I created.
You’ve made all of the pain I’ve endured worth it.
You’re what I’ve been searching for this whole time
I’ve been wandering lost for as long as I can remember.
The only thing that kept me sane was the burning desire that there was more
I had given up on love, I’d given up on myself
Then you opened my eyes and showed me that there is so, so much more.
Copyright © Matthew Brend | Year Posted 2019
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Details |
Matthew Brend Poem
I’ve always been lost in my mind.
I’ve wandered aimlessly for as long as I can remember
in search of something I could never name.
I’d lost hope.
I hated myself for hurting the people who weren’t what I was looking for.
I blamed myself for the pain of those around me.
I tried to lose myself inside of people but nothing could steal me away from myself.
The demons inside my head wrapped me into their cruel embrace.
They whispered sweet lies into my ear while they dragged me deeper into the abyss of myself.
I was lost for so long that I began to believe this was the way things would always be.
I was so lost,
So lost inside of the prison of self despair that I unknowingly built brick by brick.
I failed again and again to find that one thing that always eluded.
Finally I could take no more and I locked myself away.
The only company I had was the demons that constantly reminded me of how broken I was.
How could anyone possibly save me when I couldn’t even save myself.
I’ve been trapped inside my mind for so long.
Something draws me deeper but it always stays just out of reach.
Mocking me with a false hope of freedom.
I’ll always be lost in my own mind.
Copyright © Matthew Brend | Year Posted 2019
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Details |
Matthew Brend Poem
I trusted her.
I went against everything I’ve believed in my whole life.
I let her in and she robbed me blind.
I want to feel some kind of anger towards her but all I feel is loss.
She was there for me at my lowest, helped me climb out of the pit of despair I’d fallen into.
Without her I would’ve fallen prey to the demons that torment my mind.
I can’t blame her for leaving and that cuts straight through me.
Cuts straight through the walls I thought I’d built.
Cuts straight to my heart and melts the ice that has surrounded my heart for as long as I can remember.
I took her for granted, I never thought she’d actually leave me but I was wrong.
That thought alone almost breaks me, I was wrong.
Copyright © Matthew Brend | Year Posted 2019
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