Details |
Rachel Stewart Poem
I wish I could be someone else,
someone I am in dreams;
Because a dream is a fix,
deeper than any drug gets,
and for that it's something for which I fiend.
Maybe it's because
it helps me forget;
All of the lies
all the regrets.
But before I could stop,
I'd never turned around;
Till I noticed I wasn't moving,
yet just sitting on the ground.
Gathering a layer of dirt,
that I can't scrub off;
I wish I had your skin,
so clean and so soft.
Cause you have not seen what I have,
your eyes are still blind;
Because you haven't messed up yet,
you haven't fallen behind.
Because you're too strong to let go,
you've even pulled me back up;
And I know since you've done this for me,
it's drained life from your cup.
And for that I love you,
and this love will never change;
Cause you have made me feel something,
and I know I will never be the same.
Now every time you stare at me,
till my vision fades to green;
It takes me someplace far,
even farther than a dream.
Copyright © Rachel Stewart | Year Posted 2008
|
Details |
Rachel Stewart Poem
I can't stand the way I feel,
I just want to break away;
My head drowns in pools of sorrow,
throughout the hours of the day.
I think about the mistakes I've made,
and how they can't be fixed;
I think about the pain I've caused,
and how it makes me sick.
When I look into the mirror,
I don't recognize the reflection;
All I see is the lies, the hurt,
and the deception.
I see my face,
but my color seems to be withdrawn;
I see my body,
but my soul seems too far gone.
The only piece of sanity,
remains deep within my eyes;
And as I peek around each sparkle,
I have to question why.
So many questions,
with no one to ask for the answers;
Nothing to cling onto,
no pills to consider enhancers.
I'm alone as I wonder,
through the labyrinths of my mind;
Creeping through my memories,
looking for something I can't find.
I see flickers of happiness,
and sprinkles of contentment;
I see the girl I use to be,
not holding this resentment.
Then I fast forward
to the memories I regret;
Those seem to be the ones
that are impossible to forget.
My heart falls
from my chest to the ground;
As the tar soaks up the pieces,
my ears are crushed from the sound.
The sound of 12 years
being rejected then denied;
The sound of combustion
taking it's place deep inside.
I begin to remember not having to hide from
or causing any pain;
Not having these behaviors,
from which I have to refrain.
I try reaching deep down,
struggling to catch onto the past;
I grasp onto the horrors,
but the good times fade fast.
I think I'm finally ready
to leave this wretched state behind;
I sit here closing my eyes,
just wishing to rewind.
I'll walk along the scars
of my memories everyday;
Getting stuck within my wishes,
just hoping to break away.
Copyright © Rachel Stewart | Year Posted 2008
|