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Christian Humphreys Poem
To my father who was never there,
my earliest memory of you, you said you didn't care.
I was only three and didn't deserve this pain,
It wasn't my choice to be born in vain.
To chose to create three beautiful lives, a mistake?
Your kids went without parents responsibility you should take.
Because it has been yours from the beginning,
Maybe if you were here i would be winning.
Instead of screwing up and doing drugs to cope,
If i had a father I might have had some hope.
Where were you when I was molested,
my life you were never interested.
You've never been there your nothing to me,
a sperm donor is all you'll ever be.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
Did you see the sun shinning bright,
securely your arms wrapped around me so tight.
Five Times or more each week beneath my covers,
always yearning for more than just part-time lovers.
Must you hold me so tender so right.
it makes me want this each and every single night.
I want to be with you always souls together free,
I want this so badly if only you could see.
See what i see us together forever face to face,
for now just keep me tucked away in your warm embrace.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
If these walls could talk they would say,
Why do you hurt me in this way?
If these walls could talk they would spiel
All the ways you've made me feel.
If these walls could talk, they would yell
All the reasons I couldn't tell.
If these walls could talk they would scream
All the ways you lowered my self-esteem.
If these walls could talk they would shout
All the reasons I needed to get out.
If these walls could talk they would say,
Why did people have to take us away?
If these walls could talk they would state
All the people I was made to hate!
If these walls could talk they would uncover
All the reasons I couldn't love her.
If these walls could talk they would say,
Why do you hurt me in this way?
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
I'm sitting here wishing I had some smoke,
smoke from a dubby and I hope I choke.
there ain't no weed here and I hope I can buy,
it's not much to ask for I just want to get high.
It takes me away from reality and my mind rest,
a well needed vacation from my thoughts which can get the best.
The only thing that helps keep them out,
is Mary-Jane that lovely lady and without her gives me doubt.
I smoke weed whenever I can,
I smoke weed so much I'm it's biggest fan.
It's a way of life the one of a stoner,
that's how I live it's as good as a *****.
So when I get some ganja everything will be okay.
and after I smoke I'll feel better the rest of the day.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
I long to be loved, cherished and admired,
or will i get another relationship conspired.
When will he come honest and true,
My appointment with him is long overdue.
I want someone to hold me tight in their embrace,
and when we make love he'll stare deep at my face.
We should never fight just disagree at times,
and when I write poetry he'll put words to my rhymes.
I need so much to say i love you and get the same in return,
but to everyone around me it's no big concern.
Just maybe I'm not meant to love,
but if I am please god send him from above.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
At first I thought I'd never love,
that's before your were sent from above.
You came in so sudden and without fear,
you left with no warning now I wish you were near.
That's quite impossible now because of the way I feel,
I feel so alone without you so I stop and kneel.
I kneel and I pray for a second chance,
but I know to you I was just a glance.
A glance into happiness something we both wish,
why can't we be together just like the spoon and dish?
I wish I could learn to cope in a new way,
So love to hate you is what I wish for everyday.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
When did all this drama start?
Was it when you stole my heart?
You ripped it out with no thought,
Love is such a pain that's not what's taught.
I was taught love was to be splendid,
I think differently now that my heart got blended.
Blended into a puddle of pain,
which my tears washed away just like rain.
my tears are like rain drops falling from the sky,
Maybe that's why I always want to stay high.
I smoke to cover up my feelings all mixed together,
It doesn't always work so i sit here with a feather.
Writing down all my pain and hurt,
Writing down all the ways you made me feel like dirt.
I'm over you today but can't quite speak on tomorrow.
I gave you my heart but just to borrow,
I want it back now so hand it here,
I'm finished with you now I can see so clear.
I now say goodbye for forever I hope,
Only now I must finds new ways to cope.
I'm tired of hurting each and every night,
So this will be the last letter i write.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
I never knew why I felt different and alone,
family didn't help much little kindness I was shown.
I hated being me especially what's inside,
I didn't know who to tell so my secrets I did hide.
I hid them from those who were supposed to be so near,
no one even noticed that everyday I lived in fear.
Fear because I thought it all happened because of me,
I didn't know he was to blame I was too young too see.
I should have been protected from those who meant me harm,
instead my mom invited him in falling for his charm.
Mom wasn't ever there she was always so high,
every single time he'd hit her we would all cry.
I'd stay awake every night to scared to even sleep,
swearing to myself that these secret I would keep.
Time went on and we grew older things stayed the same,
I'd hope and pray that she would leave him but that day never came.
Eleven years of deeply embedded hurt,
eleven years of being scared and treated like dirt.
Then it happened she left him for good,
I wish she did it sooner if only she could.
Finally I'm free of the man that I grew to hate,
If It only happened quicker my mom was to late.
Late because he hurt me in more ways than one,
only that can't be changed now because what's done is done.
The secrets I once kept inside are free at last,
but it still doesn't change the fact that I grew up way to fast.
I'll never get my childhood back that's gone for good,
but I wouldn't even change the past even if I could.
True what happened should had never been done to me.
still I'm stronger because of it everyone i know would have to agree.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
Because of you my life was given to me,
Becuase of you my life is what it was made to be.
Because of you I felt abandoned and thrown away,
Because of you I never thought we would stay.
Because of you I can't trust anyone but me,
Because of you many horrible sights I was forced to see.
Because of you I was abused in more ways then one,
Because of you my childhood was filled with horror instead of fun.
Because of you I learned that drugs were the thing to try,
Because of you look at me I can't stop and you keep asking me why?
Because of you I learned how not to be a dad,
Because of you I'll give my kids everything i never had.
Because of you i hate me,
Becuase of you I can't break free.
Because of you I learned how to be tough and never get hurt,
Because of you no one can ever make me feel like dirt.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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Christian Humphreys Poem
My heart was broken then ripped out my chest,
agonizing pain far worse then the rest.
I thought I was strong enough to handle any emotion,
But I guess i gave you way to much devotion.
I gave you my heart wanting love and respect,
Instead you ripped it out with the utmost reject.
Even after you showed me no compassion or true interest,
I came running back with open arms ready for your next test.
I came back to you for a fresh start,
You had plans to play with my heart.
No more chances for you you've been given too many,
Now I wouldn't even want you if you cost a pennie.
Copyright © Christian Humphreys | Year Posted 2008
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