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Mary Brogdon Poem
I dream of you and me each night.
I see me walking on a dirt road.
I hear the sound of a four-wheeler
and as it comes closer everything
turns into slow motion.
On the four wheeler, me and you.
We look so happy, so full of love.
The scene changes.
Now I'm in your Jeep. Backseat.
I look up and I see you driving and
me in the passenger seat.
We're laughing and having fun.
The scene changes again.
I'm standingg in my yard. Its night.
I look up and see us sitting on the tailgate
of my dad' truck.
I gasp as I realize that this is the last time
we were together.
The last time I hugged you.
Kissed you.
Your head is on my chest and we
both have smiles on our faces.
We're happy.
The scene changes yet again.
I'm standing in my yard still. Its day.
I am watching myself fall apart.
I have a phone in my hand,
I set it down and start crying hysterically.
I wake up then and smile 'cause its
not real.
Just a dream.
Then I feel my swollen eyes.
My head is spinning.
I realize that it wasn't just a
dream.
It is my days spent with you.
Playing over and over and over in my head.
I wish it were all just a dream and we were
still together, still happy.
Why can't it just be a dream?
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
I closed my eyes yesterday.
When I did, I saw us.
Laughing, talking.
You asked me if I loved you.
I went to answer you with a joyful
yes when you disappeared.
I opened my eyes and remembered
that you had already left.
Long ago.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
As I sat on the bathroom floor,
crying,
contemplating death,
I slowly ran the razor blade
across my bare skin.
Cutting deeper and deeper.
I sighed.
Not in pain, but relief.
This pain drowned out all other emotional pain.
Loneliness, guilt, anger, depression.
It was all gone,
if only for a few minutes.
I slowly came back to reality and
cleaned up the blood,
washed my cuts clean,
put on my jacket and long pants,
and prepared for another long, lonely, depressing day.
All the time thinking about how later I could
escape into the bathroom
on the floor,
crying,
running the razor blad across my bare skin.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
My head is filled with thoughts of you.
Your sweet voice, your beautiful face.
It all comes to me when I close
my eyes.
It disappoints me when I open
them and you're not there.
Nowhere to be found.
Gone. Forever.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
Your face haunts my dreams.
Your voice my mind.
I wish the torture would stop but I'm
glad it hasn't.
I don't know what I'd do if I
didn't have your voice to think about
your face to dream about.
I don't know what I'd do.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
Late at night, I scream out in
pain.
Not on the outside, on the in.
My heart has turned black and
cold since you left my side.
It burns my chest and I just
have to cry.
It leaves my eyes swollen up,
my face twisted, my words
slurred.
I go through this every night.
I will go on through this never ending
agony until you come back to me.
I know deep down inside you never
will.
So late at night, I'll still scream
out in pain.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
Alone.
This is what I am.
I am in a room full of many people.
Yet, i'm still alone.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
When I see you not only does my face
light up.
My heart does too.
My soul is filled with love because its
found it mate.
I don't think you fully understand how
much I love you.
I can't live without you.
I don't know what I'd do if
you don't find your way back into
my arms.
Back into
my
heart.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
Depression.
It never leaves.
Never lets up.
Never.
Its always there eating away at my
soul.
Picking away at my happiness.
Making my life worse.
Taking away my light and replacing it with
darkness.
Nothing works.
Not pills, not talking,
nothing.
My depression will always be present.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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Mary Brogdon Poem
darkness.
What I've lived in for so long.
Yea, the light flickered a little when i thought
i was in love.
When i realized I wasn't, back came the darkness
to claim my soul.
When i actually fell in love with you
there was a new blinding light that
surrounded me wherever I looked.
Then you left and that light vanished.
Along with all my hopes and dreams.
Now I'm left in the darkness again.
Awaiting your return that will turn back on my light.
Awaiting something that will never happen.
Awaiting alone
in
the darkness.
Copyright © Mary Brogdon | Year Posted 2007
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