Twas the night after Christmas
Alone with my tinder, ex-spouse
Holed up with this fumigating grouse
Trite presents with her I did douse
Wrapped with old newspaper that she did delouse
With boiling anger she did fumble then browse
From recycled boxes pulled a dingy sweater and moldy blouse
Fueled by spite she began to spew and touse
When to her glee, she my present did espouse
An unwrapped cask of cheap wine, she did uprouse
She intimated that I could now intox and bouse
While she with a better man did carouse
After a few drinks, the blanched holly and mildewing mistletoe did
arouse
A tender feeling for that renovated louse
Categories:
uprouse, funny
Form: Rhyme