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If Adam Had Not Met Eve Hitler Should Have Met Freuid
If only Eve hadn’t met Adam
And angry Hitler had met Freuid
If Stanley never met Ollie
And David Gilmore had never been in Pink Floyd
Shakespeare had run out of ink and quill for a pen
Mother Hubbard's cupboard was full
There weren't any eggs or hens
If Helen of Troy was so ugly she sunk a thousand ships
Chuck Berry lost his cherry
And Mick Jagger didn't have rubber lips
You no longer went to bed with Pricilla and woke up with a gorilla
Women didn't have plastic boobs clinging on to their chest
So much war paint and poly filler
Nero had no Rome
No one had invented soap
And singers had no microphone
If Oppenheimer had a heart
And they just dropped Sherbert bombs
There were no love affairs that sadly fell apart
If there were no flowers or bees
No alphabet or language
And the moon was not made of cheese
Sir Walter Raleigh hadn’t brought tobacco to our shores
And Jaws had no teeth
Tarzan never wore clothes no more
If Columbus never found America
And there were no Indian wars
Couples who can't stick together just bond with as many as you can
If whisky came by a truckload
When people talk jibberish you understand
Polititions were foslsizrd dinosaures
And Mohammed lived to take to the ring once more
If jail was a heaven and the outside was hell
Your house had no windows and doors
And a storyteller had no more stories to tell
If there weren’t any broken hearts only whole
And freshly baked, bread had no smell
Cottage cheese didn’t have a cottage no spoon or a bowl
Money grew on trees taxman never was ever told
People stay young forever and never grow old.
Copyright ©
Peter Dome
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