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I Used To Be A Jumper In My Doc Marten Boots
I used to jump from aeroplanes
Naked
With nothing
But a parachute
A prayer
And a pair of Doc Marten boots
I've landed in some strange places
Once in a chair
Once or twice in the mud
A Woman once
I said will you?
She said no!
But she meant yes
I guess?
One time I fell through a roof
And landed in someone's bed!
The husband wasn't very pleased
I can't repeat what he said
But I learned a few new words
Once I fell into a hole
Then I realised someone had died
I couldn't wait to get out
As shouted'',Help!!!!''.
I fell in a well
Well that's another story
To tell
I even landed in a stolen car
But I didn't get far
I once dropped into a giant cooking pot ouch!!
Boy, it was hot!
One time in a church
The Vicar said ''Do you''?
I said I do
Two sugars no milk, please
I was awarded a medal, with a pin
But it gave me an infection
And ended up in a hospital bed
Got really ill and had to stay in
I had to stop parachuting
But I still have my Doc Marten boots
Don't dare tell you where I hanged them from
Ahh, life's full of surprises
I think, I'll buy a Army tank
See where that gets me.
Copyright ©
Peter Dome
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