|
| |
Poems going nowhere that don't get finished
This is a broken emptiness
So surrounded in fixedness you can't get at it
All I've ever wanted, I'm that
But in disorder
Unoriginal amongst poets
My drama is bound, I won't let it out
All doors remain shut
I dare not taste my own chaos
So my mind thrashes about
Sometimes... perhaps I overhype that
I don't see other minds to compare
Actually I soothe and calm them
Tell them they are ok
That I can solve their problems
This is how, I say... This is how
The how works because they are them
And I just have the answers
-----
Unruly logic affects my lack of prescriptions
Prescriptive slow jam impacts my decisions
Aches terrible aches of last lives
Linear time follows linear time
Still I craft indistinguishable shapes
Crave substance from longing
Observe hands beyond mine
Elegant yet empty, like the songs I sing
Unable to back away from this thing
Part of it, for all I know
Knowing creeps and files away edges
Unmasks promises of unrecalled pledges
Sleeps whilst I lay awake seeking
Startles me as I'm not weeping
Awakening something I dare not feed
The loneliness of the unmet need
Remembering tears, unshaped fear
Bring to form what seeps into thought
Wrapped in emotion, overwrought
Tempt me to plunge into the pool
Remove sensation, forget rules
Weighted to a path like I know who I am
Internal screams of sham, sham, sham
It's trauma, very simply the complex kind
Despite knowing all about it, it messes with your mind
If only I could edit what I hear and see
Edit what I write, edit what I think
Plunge but rise instead of sink
------
I'm a little too tired
Memories feel hard to access
Melancholy teeters at the edges
Should anyone suggest bad of me I'd crumble
I've expended energy without recharging
As I lay warm and comfortable I wonder what might help
I wrote some stuff
Unpoetic and awkward
------
When all the pages are full
and my head is empty
then what?
When I've checked that I'm loved
and there's no need to worry
what will I do?
It could be today, nothing is stopping it being right now.
My head isn't empty but it contains nothing urgent...
But I wait for the start of something, it feels like it needs sunny days and open arms but it doesn't really... I can turn up and announce my arrival....
Copyright ©
Di11y Da11y
|
|