Mary Morse demanded a horse
"Give me a horse I say!
I want a damned horse
You'll get it of course
Tomorrow is my birthday!"
Mary was scary and very specific
"The horse that you get me must be terrific
And only ten inches tall
So I can take her to school in my bag
She won't have to live in a stall."
"A ten inch horse is not scientific,"
Her fearful parents said.
"It's all that I want!" was Mary's brag
"Get it or you'll be dead!"
All they could find for her
On such short notice:
A three-inch robot horse
They named Mrs. Otis.
But Mary was mad!
"Mrs. Otis won't do!"
She hacked up her parents,
Flushed them down the loo.
The ghosts of her parents
Returned to the house
To possess Mrs. Otis
As small as a mouse.
The small robot horse
Climbed up Mary's cooch
And stirred up her organs a scootch
The horse popped back out
And ran all about
Then moved to Bagdad without notice.
the world's a pretty hard place
but it ain't as tough as you
you're a rough tough b*tch
you got a lotta hair on your cooch
you're always right and always loud
as if they're not the same
i'm not a lustful man
but you have your ways
What You Get Free From Wal-Mart
By Elton Camp
Once you had to pay to see the freak show
Now enjoy it free when to Wal-Mart you go
The fat lady is longer found only at a fair
Go to Wal-Mart and she will be there
Likewise for the Wild Man from Borneo
At Wal-Mart he is anytime that you go
To the cooch show you once paid admission
In Wal-Mart, the sluts are on free exhibition
Many customers will range from X to PG
Shop at Wal-Mart and see it all for free
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