Best Typically Poems

Luke treats eating like a contest
An all that you can eat
Luke scoffs down everything
Fills himself down to his feet

Today he swallowed down six doughnuts
He gobbled up some pies
He munched his way through a chocolate cake
Two hamburgers and some fries

Luke was very pleased with himself
Acting like...

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It’s Luke's first day at school today
I wonder how he’s getting on
I hope he is behaving himself
I hope the crayons haven’t all gone

Because Luke is partial to crayons
He seems to just love wax
He sees a pack of crayons
As some exotic snacks

I wonder if he will...

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Luke always likes
To try out something new
And today he decided
That he would drink shampoo
 
Of course it made him feel quite sick
But that’s the least of all his troubles
Because now every time he opens his mouth
Out float a million bubbles
 
And bubbles come from his...

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Luke got hold of a camera
 And went on a picture taking spree
 He took a picture of his baby brother
 He took a picture of me
  
He took a picture of his nan
 He took a picture of his mum
 He even took...

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Luke has a special friend
That only he can see
He calls him Herbert Sherbet
Invisible to you and me

I have never seen him
But he must be real I presume
When things get broken it's never Luke
Though only he's in the room

So many ornaments broken
So many valuables lost
All destroyed...

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Friday is spelling test day
At the school where Luke does go
Of course Luke hadn’t learnt the words
He just didn’t want to know

He should have learnt them every night
Straight after tea
But he’d much rather go out and play
Or sit and watch TV

Come Friday morning
Luke claimed that...

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Captain Evil Eye is here
More a super villain than a hero
Just one look from his evil eye
Your temperature drops to zero

Yes it is Luke’s little party trick
This thing he does with his eye
When he stares at you with that look
You don’t know whether to laugh...

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This is the first in a series of poems about my cheeky grandson, Luke
Luke decided to go fishing
On a warm spring like day
With a huge net on a poll
And an old jam jar he found on the way

He didn't catch any fish
But got some frog...

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Luke’s lips are swollen
 He doesn’t look that great
 It must be an allergic reaction
 To something that he ate

 Luke’s lips are swollen
 It’s pretty hard to ignore
 It can’t be the nuts he scoffed down
 As he has had loads of them before

...

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The second in a series of poems about my cheeky grandson, Luke
Hurry up, Luke we’re going to be late
Get your head out of the garden gate
Don’t know what you put it there for
You’ve got it stuck three times before

At the other side there’s nothing new
So...

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I found Luke an old golf club
And several shiny golf balls
That will keep him quite for a while
While I make a few phone calls

Smash, went a window
In the greenhouse out the back
Smash, went another one
It sounds like we’re under attack

Smash, went the old fish tank
We...

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Luke got a letter from school
A sea voyage they had planned
Luke was really excited
As you may well understand
  
On the day everyone had a wonderful time
But someone was staying below deck
Feeling really ill, should have taken a pill
And was looking like a wreck
 ...

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This room is in an awful state
Someone couldn't care less
How could anybody live this way
Such a terrible mess
 
Wallpaper hangs from the walls
A wardrobe is missing it's door
An unmade bed full of crumbs
And stuff all over the floor
 
Something hangs from the ceiling
That once upon...

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It is one of life's little mysteries
Why with Luke things seems to go wrong
Maybe because he sticks his head
In places it don't belong
 
Today Luke got it stuck in a bucket
So to the hospital he did go
How on earth he managed to do it
Perhaps we'll...

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Mixing a little potion here and there
Something strange is stinking
Why did they buy Luke that chemistry set?
What on earth where they thinking?
 
Nothing good can come of it
There will be trouble down the road
It is only a matter of time
Before we hear something explode
 
Luke...

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