My Christmas Box by Rob Barratt
We’ll have an X-Men, X-files, X-Box, no socks, X-Factor, Max Factor, Max Bygraves, no war
graves of a Christmas
I want empathy, an MP3, a hemp-free, hump-free, grump-free, Humperdink, have-a drink
of a Christmas
An Oh Come All Ye Faithful, Oh strictly come dancing, come-on come-on, curmudgeonly
comfy chair of a Christmas
A Doctor Do-Little, Doctor Who, PS2, Snoop Dog, poop scoop, Scooby Doo, *doo-bi-doo-bi-
doo, bi-doo-bi-doo-bi, …doo-bi-doo-bi-doo, bi-doo-bi-doo-bi …. of a Christmas
*(sing this bit to “Strangers in the Night” by Frank Sinatra)
A God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, eat, drink and be very, very, very merry, Neneh Cherry,
cherubim, seraphim, Cherry B, Babycham, Babyshambles, Baby Jesus of a Christmas
An Electric Ladyland, electronic toy, Toy Story, Tolstoy, toyboy, ladyboy, ladyshave,
Ladybird, Ladysmith Black Mambazo of a Christmas
We’ll have a Kung Fu Panda pandemic, planned pandemonium, potted plants, Pirates of
Penzance, pants of a Christmas
A no God, I-pod, I want, I got, what a lot, why not, chestnut-hot, gut rot of a Christmas
We’ll have a Band Aid, slow fade, old Slade, teasmaid, Lucozade, “Look at my presents!” of a
Christmas
I want a no-Mugabe, Punjabi, kohlrabi, Westminster Abbey, get flabby, kimosabe, Abu
Dhabi, yabba-dabba-doo, fandabidozi, Beaky, Mick and Tich ……of a Christmas
I don’t believe angels exist
‘Cos I’m a bit of an atheist
But I hope you all have………….
An archangel Gabriel, Hark the Herald Angels Sing, wing-ding, wild thing, Angel Delight, no
fights, fairy lights, angel cake, William Blake, Angel Clare, love everywhere, angels above,
peace and love, peace and love, peace and love….. of a Christmas
Merry Christmas!