You’re beautiful

You mean so much to me you make me melt inside Like a popsicle on that you melt my heart on time I really do love you tho you help me strive me up when I was at the lowest of my lows you were stuck by my side with me yeah you helped me up You make the pain go away like how blood goes away when you playin with a razor blade in that stream of water pouring from the shower on your face Don’t let me drown I don’t wanna die today I wanna see you in heaven light so I have to stay up another night , so my brain don’t go from happy to down like it’s always tearing me down down down I’m falling and melting into the fuc king ground I can’t stand sinking in the sand you gonna let me fall or help me out. You decide cus we don’t have much time let me know what you wanna do imma put my better judgment all inside you because you were here before my mental health issues before I started hearing voices and get the bipolar anger out bursts you were my ride or die and I can feel my brain is dying inside it’s not gonna make it up within the year I can tell how this makes me feel how it chews me up then spits me out like I was nasty bitter taste in its mouth we lost all hope in my brain functioning properly and I’m going go a bit crazy like Ive already been snapping on everyone who looks at me crazy because I start to get paranoid and my mind gets hazy like it’s eat me alive tryna play nah you play with my emotions not my brain please don’t make me see people don’t see and I don’t wanna hear the voices who wanna drag me to hell hoping I make it out of this dark depressing ass year and I hope I make it til my medicine works and you don’t lose as fast as we think it’s gonna hit but I will always love you guys just remember that my brain might not be well at 23 anymore but I’ll be here even if I lose my and can’t even help anyone not even me eventually which is the scariest part about the whole thing I went from Normal to drowning and sleepwalking not allowed to help my self and people can barley help me I’m sleepwalking but let’s be honest how hurt would you think I’d feel to realize I have nothing to show anymore for yourself or for others and some depressing ass and my mom said she wasn’t fu cking with me anymore she hates me and thinks I’m just a terrible daughter and a horrible person why can I help that tho what did she expect from me? I can’t control anything so if you don’t like me that’s okay keep your opinions privately it’s gonna hurt me to hear it thanks