Your life

I am terrified and this is love Resignation; this is love Yours is fiercer than mine, less green Pale, flowing as a riverbed and more of it Yours is funny in the basest way My body curls around the edges as you talk Away from your mouth Backed my nose into a wall Crushing myself to let you love me And feel no shame in it Is that a service to the both of us Will our children not be grateful That I slowly grow away The more my fingers bite cuts into my palm I soothe you with my lips And whilst air blows through Your clouds of smoke Me and my riverbed behind the house Hidden by the trees you paid for Sink deeper than we’re ever out to do Is it you that I cannot let die Or your child-self in the cellar Locked away with the dust and me