You Were My First

You were my first real love I only loved you from afar I only spoke to you when you asked to borrow a pencil But for me, It was always a rollercoaster of love and hurt I really loved you, I did But you didn't look at me the same way I looked at you Whereas you were the beat of my heart, I was just the fly on the windowsill I used to dream about you I used to imagine us going out for ice cream I would long for my imagination to become my reality I let myself believe that you could one day return the feelings That I eternally gave to you I gave you my heart, my love And all you did was push it aside without even realizing it I wish you had paid attention to me I wish you had known all my secrets, all my quirks I think it would have been nice, for us to be friends At least then I could say I knew some things about you I'm not excatly sure what it was that made me love you It just happend One minute I was a river, calmly flowing with the soft chirp of birds in the background But then you came along And I became an ocean with waves and sharks and everything that made my life insane You were my first love But you were also my first heartbreak