You Are Not Love

I have always had to ask what being in love feels like it is usually described by the way the other gets a sparkle in their eye or the dances in the living room. I have never had this type of love my love was always toxic like swimming with rocks in your pocket . I have never known true love my idea of love was toleration the bad moods unanswered prayers for a good one. what we had was not love it was a war and the bedroom was a battlefield where all our wars took place , where we tried to hide the pain but it was stained in the walls , the yells echoed and the tears left water marks on the celling we did not have love we had the fear of being alone