David Crandall Poet Rhyme

Why Am I a Vegetarian?

I saw my doting mom, approach
with a plate of vomit and fried cockroach,
saying, "Eat this with buzzard dong,
and you'll grow up to be big and strong. 
Eat your spam parmesan, a la mode
and salamander nematode,
your casserole of braised rat butts,
sprinkled lightly with scrambled guts.
Tell me - would you be predisposed
if it were slightly decomposed?
How about some lukewarm carrion?"

That's why I'm a vegetarian.

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Andrea Dietrich September 23, 2026 at 2:25 AM There is a dead 🪳 at the bottom underneath your poem. An ad?? I don't think we are able to put pics UNDER our poems , are we?? What a funny coincidence. 😂 David Crandall September 23, 2026 at 10:10 AM Haha, I think some AI may be reading the poems on our screens and tailoring the ads to match. Uhoh, you better be careful reading my poems 😄

Andrea Dietrich September 23, 2026 at 2:23 AM Oh my goodness. What did your mother do to you? Hahaha. Silly vegetarian. JK. 🤔. David Crandall September 23, 2026 at 10:13 AM Haha, I may have exaggerated some of the strange things she put on a plate and called dinner. Like I say, my brothers seemed to have no problem with it, so it could be I'm the weirdo - lol 😄

CayCay Godwin September 22, 2026 at 5:17 PM Yet you preferred that meal over my Southern dishes? Maybe? This is funny. I didn't mean to click on it but I'm glad I did. CayCay p.s. after our 'discussion' last night, imagine my surprise to go over to Gershon's place a few moments ago and find him having a love affair with his FINGERS? check it out. sh, he's below David Crandall September 22, 2026 at 5:27 PM and fried chickens, doesn't that make you think of the electric chair? David Crandall September 22, 2026 at 5:22 PM There was a "soul food" restaurant years ago in West L.A. I used to order okra and collard greens and mac and cheese and black-eyed peas and corn bread and sweet potato pie - that stuff was pretty good. If it's got meat in it, forget it - no pigs feet - that's the stuff of nightmares! Imagine, pigs without feet.

Gershon Wolf June 29, 2026 at 8:15 PM Gosh, David, what a loving and caring mom you had... David Crandall July 1, 2026 at 3:56 PM She was actually well-intentioned; she just had a strange way with food. Actually, my three brothers gobbled up the oozing, ground animal concoctions she served us - so, maybe I'm the weird one...nah!

Alison A Smith June 29, 2026 at 6:21 PM If given that choice I to would be vegetarian. David Crandall July 1, 2026 at 3:56 PM haha, yep! David Crandall July 1, 2026 at 3:53 PM haha, yep!