Whoops

In a world that’s changing quickly for the likes of you and me,
we can hardly keep up with the pace that passes endlessly.
I’m not talking ‘bout technology, computers seem to give,
I’m talking ‘bout society and that means the way we live.

I’m no example; I’ve had two wives and working on me third,
so marriage seems that it’s no more than just a fleeting word,
and if there is some hassle that means working through the heat,
it seemed much easier to turn my back and walk off down the street. 

But the weighted scales of justice take their turn along the track,
and bring up what’s forgotten when they tighten up the slack.
There’s derision then division and a lifelong scar to heal,
then silly buggers just like me jump back upon the wheel.

After two bites of the cherry there is a certain wary mood,
and when a woman steps up with a smile I’m pretty bloody clued
as to what intentions she might have - not like a friend Henry   
who recently got married to a perilous divorcee.

I know she doesn’t like me much, but she really don’t like men,
and with the attitude she’s got I wondered why she wed again,
but Henry is the type of bloke who just likes to tag along,
so I bet in their marriage she’s the one who’s bloody strong.

I’m in the hospital and visiting my good mate Henry now.
He’s been beaten to a pulp and I’m about to tell you how.
We were dining in a hotel; Henry and his wife and me,
when we saw this fellow stagger and as drunk as he could be. 

Henry made a comment then, that put him in a tricky place,
when he noticed how his woman kept on looking at his face,
so he asked her if she knew him and she answered “Yes I do.
He is my ex husband - now believe me this is true”.

“Since I left him seven years ago he’s been drinking every night”, 
then Henry made this statement with its power to incite,
 “That’s remarkable” said Henry; then things went awful wrong,
“I can’t believe that anyone could celebrate that long.”
Copyright © | Year Posted 2021

Poem

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Dietrich Avatar
February 8, 2021 at 1:45 PM
As always, a fantastic lol at the end!!!
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:28 PM
Thank you Andrea. A comment from you is always appreciated - catch you soon Andrea - Lindsay
Ball Avatar
February 8, 2021 at 10:16 AM
This one really made me chuckle. It's going into my faves. To tell the truth I've known some women and some men who if their mate ever got rid of them they would celebrate a looooonng time. And I would help them. great story Lindsay. You are always good for a giggle. God Bless, JB
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:25 PM
Hello Judy ... me too. Some of the blokes I know haven't stopped celebrating and never will, but it wasn't their wives fault. Catch you soon Judy - Lindsay
Proxenos Avatar
February 5, 2021 at 9:34 AM
The ending was a surprise, but I should have expected it. Your stories are excellent, and what I do like in particular, is that you write about people you know, places you know, incidents that have involved you and much more. Hugs and blessings, Jennifer.
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:21 PM
Hello Jennifer ... you certainly hit the nail on the head with your comment. I find it much easier to write these tales if I focus on the truth but turn it into fiction - thank you once more Jennifer - Lindsay
Canerdy Avatar
February 5, 2021 at 7:31 AM
Lindsay, this is a well-rounded poem--with vivid descriptions, frankness, and humor. He really paid for that wisecrack! Janice
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:17 PM
Hello Jennifer ... thank you for your fine comment indeed. I'm pleased you enjoyed this one - Lindsay
Wolf Avatar
February 3, 2021 at 7:47 PM
Classic, just pure classic, Lindsay. A tale for the ages... If this had been Henry VIII, it would have been understandable why there never was a Henry IX! lol. Thanks, mate! ~ Such is fate, gw
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:15 PM
Hello Gershon ... why thank you, but being a classic; dunno about that but I'll take it. Yes old Henry VIII didn't keep the heads on his wives long enough for a Henry IX - thanks again Gershon - Lindsay
Leffanta Avatar
February 3, 2021 at 1:18 PM
Too long for the Reader' Digest "perfect squelch" but till perfect! Thank you for the laugh! Aloha! Rico
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:11 PM
Hello Rico ... I hope I'm not putting ideas in your head Rico - thanks again Rico - Lindsay
Logan Avatar
February 3, 2021 at 12:22 PM
Well gee, he sure asked for that beating. LOL Loved your humor.
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:09 PM
Hello Jenna ... I guess the moral is; choose your words carefully. Thank you once again Jenna - Lindsay
Hinshaw Avatar
February 3, 2021 at 9:18 AM
Another great and entertaining story from you repertoire of witty verse, Lindsay! We need your writes to keep us laffing in these dreary times! Keep on wielding your pen for our enjoyment - Bob
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:06 PM
G'day Bob ... we need a darn good laugh down here. We've been put into lockdown for the third time. I'll keep trying to give you a chuckle Bob - Lindsay
Edmonds  Avatar
February 3, 2021 at 8:58 AM
Very amusing Lindsay, what a laugh I had at the fantastic ending... Belle
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:03 PM
Hello Belle ... a tale of putting your foot in your mouth. Thanks Belle - Lindsay
Cunningham Avatar
February 3, 2021 at 1:18 AM
Haha cracking ending lindsay, didn't see that coming, neither did Henry lol. Tom
Laurie Avatar
February 14, 2021 at 3:02 PM
G'day Tom ... no, I hope he survived the aftermath - thanks Tom - Lindsay
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