What You Don'T Know About Me

What comes to your mind upon hearing my name? That I am the moody girl, who walks alone, Or that that I am the quiet girl who is always at home? Do you say I am social? - Most likely; no! Because I do not know that about myself. But, do you also say that I hate people? - Yes Because that is what you think of me, Basing on how I conduct myself in society. This is what you do not know about me; You do not know that I try all I can to come out, In the perfect shape that fits in this modern society, Where all standards have been raised and, That if I were to fit amongst you, I would have to first get rid of my hot temper. This is known for ruining it all for me, always; You do not know, that I am afraid I will hurt you, By my harsh words when something goes wrong before my eyes, For I would say I am almost a perfectionist in my own world! You do not know, that I have a lot on my mind, That keeps tickling me to spit it out, Yet I find it half- baked and not worthy to be picked up by your busy ears, Which need to be hear me say there is good justice in the country when there is actually none? For it would cause me more trouble in the end, If I fail to defend the words from my own mouth when things go wrong; Because a short tempered person will do a lot of crazy things, Yet will hardly remember anything or what made them do it. This does not justify why I isolate myself, But may be, it is because I find myself not fit to be one of you. But still, this does not mean I hate you, For I would never open up to you, To tell you my deepest secret if I did not trust or love you. I know it hurts when I sit apart from you; So, I only wanted you to know this, So that you never say that I did not return the love you showed to me. I have alot I imagine I could have done with you, But I am not confident enough to face my fears and responsibilities, When the milk goes bad at last!