Todd Eatherly Poet Free verse

What I Wish to Forget

I feign to remember
that day walking back
from turfed fields
sweat on the brow
robots on the mind.
Only, in that lockered room
did I feel that chill of fear
preeminence crawling up my spine,
snickering teammates entering,
I loitered no longer.
Or tried to,
My feet sank through the floor
petrified
as he loomed, eyes dark
wicked with intent
predator upon prey
flight and adrenaline 
kicking my teeth in.

Stone shattering
I bolted, like a deer
only to get hit by the headlights
ragdolled against the table
freedom swallowed by dread.

Helpless, he threw himself
against me.
time after time after time
while all they did was watch
cackling like hyenas.

My rage grew as
the cacophony of laughter increased
building with each thrust
against me, vision darkening
painted red
as he threw me aside.
Red blackening
turning inward instead.


Heart of gold? Bah!
I left that room stumbling,
Rage boiling,
trust shattered,
acid eating away at the “gold”
of my heart.
Comradery turning
Into betrayal and painted masks.

Yet

all I wanted to do is break him
like he broke me,
snap his bones one by one
let him scream like I did,
watch him curl into a ball
to weep as I did
only for no one to save him
like no one saved me.

You can “forgive” easily, but forgetting?
You can never “forget” being helpless.
It curls into your soul like a disease
quiet but still lingering.
Waiting.
Watching.
“Gone” but never truly gone.

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment