What do I appreciate

Something I appreciate in life. Have you ever really thought about that? What really matters to you. Who or what's there when it really matters to you? Appreciation, Gratification, Associations, What makes you feel true love and satiation? Is it your higher power, is it the trees & flowers? Or is it a person you can sit and talk to for hours? Do you feel appreciated? Has true love been activated? Does your sickness feel like you'll never become acclimated? I feel unlovable, untouchable, broken inside! Before I got this sick….all I did was get high!! Now I'm never going back to that, these sickness’s kinda saved my life