What Am I Looking For?
I awake in the middle of the night
Something's missing
The alarm rings, I get up,
There's something I need...
What it is escapes me...
I shower and dress...
Comb my hair, apply cologne...
What is it in the back of my mind?
That thing I want so bad...
That haunting vaporous void in my life...
What is that dragging weight
Of want...
One I can't even speak...
Sometimes a glass of milk eases this empty feeling,
Somedays it requires many glasses of wine,
I can dull it,
But it's always there
Gnawing at my chance for inner fulfillment...
This ghostly unhappiness,
This unshakeable sense of loss
It's not money
Not fame
And it's more specific than happiness
It's what would bring happiness to me
It teases me in its absence
It twists my insides with its mystery
What is it I so desperately need?
It is you.
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