Kwamnandi Gwama Poet Free verse

We lacked something

We made sense, yet we did not work out. 

I wish I knew that the last time I was going to hold your hand would be the last. 

The last time I kissed you. 
The last time we held hands.

I said what I needed to say.
And it was met with words that were detached. 
I wish I could tell you how much I did not want us to end.
How much I wanted us to work. 
How much I cared for you. 

But it didn’t seem like you cared enough to listen. 
I miss you, and it’s barely been a day.
I refuse to cry, so instead I write. 

I wish you cared enough. 
Cared enough to tell me what was going on inside your head.
I wish I could understand you. 
Sadly, I never will get the chance to. 

I finally chose myself, and it feels wrong. 
So wrong, yet I know it was the right choice. 
Because you did not try. 
I knew I would be hurt soon or later. 

And sadly, I chose sooner because I know I was falling in love with you.  
And to lose someone you love hurts less when you do it before you give your all.

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