Wasted

Black out-wasted on you Destroyed and enchanted You never see what you do that blood is yours Your retched grime and dust Slowly engulf the heart Carving a delicate line .. Yet never take it apart Feather kissed scars Like a smiling warrior You will never win the battle I control the war

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Marty Lipscomb

Date: 3/16/2012 7:48:00 PM

Hi, It's okay but rather deep.

Michael Ellis

Date: 12/10/2011 4:03:00 AM

Even with a mixed rhyme vehicle, you find a way to be powerful and effective...You leave an ominous warning to your reader...One of your strongest lines: Feather kissed stars Power ending...Good to see similes make a come back...Overall a great effort and a successful one.