Victim

I never wanted it to be this way, I never wanted to feel the pain. Bruises all over me. Invisible but I can see them. You hurt me everywhere. My heart is shattered and the blood has frozen. But I won't be your victim. Stare at me like this all you want. Try and hurt me with your words just as long as you don't use fists. I don't ever want to be your victim. I refuse to be one of those few girls who end up losing their whole world. Love isn't supposed to hurt, but maybe I was just naive because the moment I loved you my heart never stopped bleeding. I won't be your victim, I won't run away. If you have something to say I won't avoid it. I'm not scared I can take whatever you try to throw. Don't hold back I promise you I will not cry. The moon is shining just like all the diamonds that you called pretend love I can't even imagine why I fell so hard. It's never clear until the glass of water is gone. But now that you've gulped me to the last I want you to know I won't be your victim. I kissed vulnerability goodbye the very last time I cried over you and I won't be your victim your not even worth it. If you feel like you must shove a door in my butt but don't make me afraid because I don't want to be I don't want to be your victim. Let go of my hand so I can peacefully drive away if you want me to I can drive over you as well. But don't make it seem like i'm causing you pain because it's obvious to see that I've been a victim and it's a shame. But I don't want to be it anymore then you so just let me go and I won't have to run. I promised you forever I laugh at this now you were never eternity love in my mind. I kept counting until the madness in ourselves would corrupt. Tears flash down my eyes as I speed down the lanes. Two bottles of Gin and I think i'm going insane. It wasn't until I crashed into a tree that I realized I was never your victim I was merely your suicide mission.