Unwanted One

"And I rejoiced in being what I was: In the lilac change, the white reptilian calm, In the bird beyond the bough, the single one, With all the air to greet him as he flew..." From: "The Rose", by Theodore Roethke One much given to introspective self absorption, little inclined to action, I record this plaintive piece..... The years go by and, though I age, I am still the lone, unwanted one. Early it was I learned to embrace pain, or to avoid it..... never to invite, through any expectation, added disappointment..... penning solitary lines, mere mental meanderings..... My drab world, all dry sand and clouded sun, sparsely populated, was a nearly vacant, arid desert. My laurels for achievements I, and others, immediately devalued. Nothing I did could be worthy of a lauding..... no good could come from an unwanted one, one outside the pale..... not from such a joyless one. The years go by, and still, I am I.....the lone, unwanted one.