Untitled

Dark dull dawn
Sunset sad silhouette
After you’re gone

Pricking pain persists
Grief getting gross
You, still in dreams exist

Lonely long life
Sinking Spirit Subsists
Where, respite lies
Copyright © | Year Posted 2007

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Kendrick Avatar
November 22, 2009 at 7:23 AM
Sad write but well done Alliteration. Keep the pen flowing. Sara
Suzadail Jr. Avatar
June 2, 2009 at 5:05 PM
Congrats Fatima on your "Untitled" alliteration being featured. Vince
Hensley Avatar
June 2, 2009 at 2:58 PM
Congratulations on your featured poem this week! Great write!
Tugaff Avatar
June 1, 2009 at 12:20 AM
Congratulation on this lovely poem being featured this week. Ernilando
Ahmad Avatar
May 20, 2009 at 10:45 AM
very beautiful.
Moreno Avatar
May 3, 2009 at 11:48 AM
Fatima, my belated congrats in making the semi finals...Raul
Yamin Avatar
April 22, 2009 at 11:18 AM
Fatima, Congrats on your elegant poem having won the semi finals. Your poem is sunk in deep pathos which touches the heart. I wish you victory in the finals. - Mohammad I quote a Quatrain from my book Rubai'yat of Josh Malihabadi -A Drop and the Ocean printed in UK: Oserve every path and every turning try/ Understand all tricks and strategies buy/ Count the heart beat of desert and aura/ Feel every joint of the earth and sky.
Mason Avatar
April 22, 2009 at 10:02 AM
Congratulations, Fatima on your writing being selected as a "first round survivor" ... smile ... and best of luck in the contest!
Brown Avatar
April 10, 2009 at 4:05 AM
Congratulations on your poetry making it in the semi finals Fatima. Wishing you the best of luck in the finals. Love, Carol
Yamin Avatar
November 5, 2008 at 4:51 PM
An awesome write Fatima! It wrenches the heart. What a deep love and what a sad picture! A well deserved feature this week. Heartiest congratulations. Keep up the good work. -Mohammad
Richards Avatar
November 4, 2008 at 6:18 PM
A great job on this form of poetry! Well deserved to be featured! Congratulations! :) Carrie
Lakhera Avatar
November 4, 2008 at 6:55 AM
Commendable job here Fatima! I confess this is what we all tend to feel after a sudden fall. Lovely use of alliteration. Congratulation on being featured. Love, Chitra
 Avatar
November 3, 2008 at 12:26 PM
Nice use of alliteration to convey your thoughts. Congratulations on having your poem featured. I wish you continued success with your writing. Karen
Winter Avatar
November 3, 2008 at 8:48 AM
Congratulations Fatima on your wonderful poetry being featured this week. Love, Shar
Jordan Avatar
November 3, 2008 at 4:24 AM
Fatima - Congratulations on having your poetry featured this week - God Bless
Brown Avatar
November 3, 2008 at 4:11 AM
Congratulations on your well deserved poem being featured this week Fatima. Love, Carol
Suzadail Jr. Avatar
November 2, 2008 at 5:38 PM
Congratulations Fatima on your "Untitled" Alliteration being featured. Vince
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace