You'll Neverknow Poet Free verse

unlikely

i spend all my time thinking about it
i can be surrounded by the prettiest sights
with the best people
doing the most enjoyable things
and i'll be caught up wondering
pondering
how it got to this
how much more will i discover 
before i can't take it any longer
how long will i let you hurt me
before i finally find the nerve to let go
will it hurt more to let you go
or to keep myself stuck in this spot 
forever
will you ever tell me everything 
admit to it all
i don't think i could trust you again 
not even with time
it'd be nice to know you think about it too
to know you feel guilty 
but i know it doesn't eat you alive
like it does me
taking any last bit of joy i have left
or any i can try to find
i'd have more room for joy if i let you go
if i can ever bring myself to it

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