Undecided

I'm never satisfied with my decisions in life. I don't understand why all the struggle and strife. All seems good from the outside looking in, But no one knows my life, they can't judge my sin. The pain is bitter, but oh so sweet. They say life is a miracle, Some kind of treat. Through their eyes, maybe. But not through mine. I know that I'm strong, And that I'll be fine. That still does not stop the pain, It grows inside, And worsens with rain . High expectations from everyone around, I think I'd be better dead in the ground.