Gershon Wolf Poet Free verse

Notes About The Poem

After you read this epic, I'm sure you'll realize that all of you are competing for second place.  But please don't be discouraged. I've spent countless, $%^%$#&*(*^%&$ hours on this poem, working out all the kinks. You don't want to put in that kind of time for this contest, do you?!  

Unbelievably Great Contest Entry For Brenda Chiri's Photo Contest

WARNING: THE CONTENTS OF THS POEM MAY BE
DANGEROUS TO YOUR PHYSICAL AND MENTAL WELL-BEING

(Photo of the Two Lovers is available on contest site),

As any physical therapist worth his salt will tell you
   These two wannabee lovers are inviting big, big trouble!*
 
                  Photo-analysis
Look at the neck of the figure on the left
   bent almost horizontal to reach the eager lips
of the poor figure on the right, whose hyperbolic
   swayed back is just a lower lordosis ache away**

While the taller of the two is asking for severe
   C3 - C-5 vertebral displacement, at minimum
'Shorty,' up on those tippy-toes, will no doubt
   tear both her quadriceps and hamstring muscles
     ~ screaming in agony before the kiss is halfway through 

              ***********************

So, OK.  I confess. This is not an actual photo-analysis
   But I am really pissed.  (Tsk, tsk. Vulgarity; I know)
Why can't I ever get a long, wet, lascivious
   mouth-watering, juicy kiss like this?  I ask you!

Well, I've never had lordosis or kyphosis
   My diagnosis is -- you guessed it -- halitosis


                 January 05, 2019
           Picture Prompt Poetry Contest
               Sponsor: Brenda Chiri
1st Prize - Halitosis Radiation Bombardment Surgery
     Presiding Surgeon: Bobby 'Come What' May
  Surgical Nurse: Caren 'Cut-and-Pray' Krutsinger


____________________________________________________________
*Note the clever repetition, ala America's poet laureate, Trump, of 'big, big,'
  one of the his (and my) awesome, innovative stylistic devices.

**Note the eerie similarity to Mick Jagger's line, 'It's just a shout away,'
    from one of his-stoned out 60's albums.  Gives you goosebumps, eh?!
    Ha, ha: It gave my parents an Excedrin headache...

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Brenda Chiri January 27, 2020 at 6:57 PM Lol Gershon I Sam about to post winners to my contest and I wanted to say this one is above 1st place you won the gold with it! So congrats my friend so wish you would have entered it! ;) Gershon Wolf January 27, 2020 at 8:49 PM Guess I should just lay back, relax, and let 'er rip a lot more often! You certainly seem to enjoy this 'work of art,' which I very much considered a 'throw-away.'... Oh, well. C'est la vie. Smiles, Gershon

Line Gauthier January 7, 2020 at 12:09 AM Wow - you are right on so many levels - how can you not take first prize with this brilliant entry!! Top notch wit and humor ! Bravo, Gershon. Gershon Wolf January 7, 2020 at 9:05 AM Well, for sure this won't take 1st prize, as it was a spoof, not meant for the contest. Brenda's already read it and had fun with it. At any rate, thank your very much for the endorsement, Line! :) gw

Kim Rodrigues January 6, 2020 at 3:09 PM A hilarious entry! I love Carolyn’s comments too! Gershon Wolf January 6, 2020 at 3:16 PM Thanks for letting me know that you liked this one, Km. Cheers, Gershon

Carolyn Devonshire January 6, 2020 at 2:06 PM Hilarious, Gershon! Hope you win the top prize. LOL I noticed Trump does repeat a lot of simple words. How can an attack be VERY major? When is a phone call PERFECT? And just one look at Mick Jagger today is enough to make anyone want to live a sober life. Great entry, my friend. Winning wishes for you. Hugs, Carolyn

Bobby May January 6, 2020 at 6:00 AM LOL GW you are too funny my brother!! Gershon Wolf January 6, 2020 at 12:58 PM Hey, Doctor, appreciate you being a good sport about this one. btw, what are your office hours? My halitosis is just killing my family. So far, 3 dead; 7 passed out. LOL. Thanks, gw

Tom Cunningham January 6, 2020 at 1:33 AM Haha brilliant Gershon, this would have been unbeatable for sure. Tom Gershon Wolf January 6, 2020 at 12:56 PM Thanks Tom... So now, the 'beat goes on!' ~ Gershon

Jenish Somadas January 5, 2020 at 10:54 PM lol..Good i read the warning first.. Otherwise I would go mental...lol.. Quite an analysis.. Gershon Wolf January 6, 2020 at 12:55 PM Whoa. You sure don't want to go 'mental.' Then you'd be in the same boat I am, rowing upstream without a paddle! LOL. Thanks, Jenish. :) gw

Caren Krutsinger January 5, 2020 at 8:52 PM Thank you so much for giving me the dubious honor of being the nurse. I am pretty sure you just ran off with first prize. Gershon Wolf January 5, 2020 at 9:08 PM Tried to page you, but you didn't respond. It was an emergency, after all. Had to do something to prevent Dr. May from fainting! He just can't take the sight of blood, you know... Smiles, Gershon

Brenda Chiri January 5, 2020 at 8:51 PM Lmmfao! Omg Gershon you have done it now hahaha! I'm in a fit of laughter and cannot stop! Ummmm I'm telling someone (don't know who but I will tell) haha!Gershon my dear friend this was quite the 1st place win haha! Too bad I have read it and by that account you are disqualified lmao! I know you didn't enter it you just love to make me die laughing! Oh my sides! Wow! Haha hehe! So clever you!;) Gershon Wolf January 5, 2020 at 9:11 PM Well, you know, since you are laughing so hard, I could just refigure it a little here and there, and enter it with the pen-name of 'Troll Under the Bridge!' ~ Thanks, Brenda!