Caren Krutsinger Poet Dramatic Monologue

Two Idiots On the Freeway

An idiot driver cut in front of me on the freeway
Just because they did not get the big picture 
I have to slam on my brakes?
Could I let it slide?
Apparently not.
I threw my hands up like “what the heck?”
She gave me the bird.
I gave her one back.
She gave me two birds.
Who was driving there?
I chased her down the freeway,
We are both honking now, acting six-years-old.
She is driving so fast it is utterly ridiculous.
I can barely keep up with her.
Luckily I am driving my husband’s Mercury.
You can go one hundred in it, and it feels like fifty.
I was horrified when we both turned off at the same ramp.
Slunk back a bit when we again headed the same direction.
Was shocked when her turn signal showed me the parking lot I wanted.
We both ended up in front of the same restaurant, and it was not open yet.
“That was FUN!” she shrieked at me.
“Did you know it was ME?” she asked.
I gave her a big hug. My best friend, Susan, had apparently gotten a new car.
“Of course!” I lied.

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Rhona Mcferran March 21, 2019 at 10:44 PM Mercy, this made me laugh so hard!! hahahahahha! ;D What a riot! Caren Krutsinger March 22, 2019 at 6:10 AM I actually laughed a bit as I wrote it, my friend.

M. L. Kiser March 21, 2019 at 1:10 PM Are you serious? That is wild! Cute but, wild! Caren Krutsinger March 21, 2019 at 8:25 PM Some of it true; lots of it false. I was laughing like a loon as I chased the other old lady down the freeway honking and giving her the bird like she was giving me the bird, thinking how much fun it would be if she was one of my friends. Before my friends arrived, I had written this in my car.

Panagiota Romios March 21, 2019 at 11:30 AM Gee, Caren! This is so perfect! And hysterical. I love this.. The "bird"terrific.)))) Panagiota Caren Krutsinger March 21, 2019 at 11:47 AM I am exaggerating a bit, but it was still "fun".

John Katz March 21, 2019 at 9:46 AM Great ending! I have watched quite a few road rage videos on YouTube, and I mostly thought, well it happens elsewhere, but it happened to me yesterday. Was in a left turn lane with two cars ahead of me. Light changes, first car goes. Second car just sits there. I tap the horn. Car starts moving, then brake checks me in the middle of the intersection. Passed the guy without conflict, but damn, he's in the wrong and acts aggressively towards me. Caren Krutsinger March 21, 2019 at 11:47 AM Our society is getting more quick to anger; we have to hold ourselves accountable and TRY to be grown-ups, John. You go first.