Trapped
I'm scratching at the walls
I'm trying to break through.
There's a wall I won't scale
And a gate I won't pass.
I'm loosing my mind
I can't catch my breath.
Go through the motions
Don't let others know
I'm suffocating.
Clawing until my fingers are raw
There's always something else to do
Somewhere else to be
But I don't get to be me
I'm trapped by the judgments I pass
And those passed on me
I waste my time trying to pick at the lock
And when someone tries to open the door
It gets blocked.
There's only one way out
And I'm trying to force it.
Trying to break down the door
Is it unlocked?
It isn't
But isn't it comfortable to be trapped
Do nothing more than is expected
Even if I got out isn't there just another room?
What will be the next thing to trap me?
If you're trapped you don't have to make any choices.
You don't have to worry about what others think.
I'm trapped and it's my own doing.
I trap myself with thoughts of I'm not good enough
Thoughts of what if someone is better than me?
I'm trapped
And I hold the key.
Copyright © Deborah Samuelson | Year Posted 2022
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