Paloma P Poet Free verse

'toxic State' of Mind Control

She was a chill drink of water,
 found him sublimely toxic
  went down smooth and easy, a
bad boy finessing timely advances,
 yet, her mama learned her good
about those types and sugar,
   turned the tables on him
added brine to his own elixir
  so the poison was sure to burn


Toxic State Contest - FJ Thomas

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

James Inman November 19, 2017 at 3:14 AM Miss you being around Paloma, intense emotions in this piece.

Ironic Zink December 24, 2016 at 8:20 AM Nice story behind the metaphor/imagery that is easy to understand in many ways. Congrats! I like it.

Kim Rodrigues December 24, 2016 at 6:40 AM Wow! Talk about a "chilly" write! Nicely done, Paloma!

Richard Lamoureux December 24, 2016 at 12:59 AM Congrats Paloma.;0)

Darren White December 23, 2016 at 1:17 PM Coming back with congratulations my elusive friend :)

Daniel Turner December 13, 2016 at 10:14 AM Remind me not to make you angry! You know what they say about "bad boys", Paloma.

Darren White December 12, 2016 at 11:33 PM Wow brine to elixir, so much toxicity in so few lines. Sugarcoat the poison! Good luck Paloma.

Chris Green December 12, 2016 at 6:56 AM Some relationships can be just that, toxic in their own way. Better to show him the door lest you find yourself at the bottom of the vat. I liked the dark humor in this Paloma. Good luck in the contest.

Justin Bordner December 11, 2016 at 3:35 PM The brine and wine of love may burn the tongue yet oft teaches the heart a new flavor of passion Paloma...J.A.B.

Judy Ball December 11, 2016 at 12:50 PM Excellent my friend. A relationship or a personality can be just as toxic as taking poison. Best to be rid of him. Loved this. Well Done. A seven from me. God Bless and thanks so much for the kind words on my "Home Alone At Night". JB

Andrea Dietrich December 11, 2016 at 12:36 PM ooh, ME LIKEY!!!! this is awesome, Paloma. Burn baby burn.

Heidi Sands December 11, 2016 at 6:49 AM Such a portrayal of a toxic state Paloma. I like your poetry this way with such strong message.

Probir Gupta December 11, 2016 at 6:01 AM Nicely conveyed ... a great work ... best wishes ...

Demetrios Trifiatis December 11, 2016 at 3:23 AM Talking about Toxic State! Wow! Excellent for the occasion dear Paloma! A seven!

Ravi Sathasivam December 11, 2016 at 2:10 AM Nicely done. Enjoyed reading it. Thanks for sharing it