To Know Love

Love it excludes me I’ve never felt my heart flutter much Seldom felt heat pool in my stomach, or a yearning for another’s touch. I’ve dreamt of a gorgeous white dress, a chilling symphony and a vow uttered with utmost sincerity I’ve dreamt of tremulous heat and desire Heaven could not rival a thundering heart beneath my tentative fingers. Of a connection formed by something almost primal. For my mind had relied a standard I could not abide In all ways but love we have pride in logic In all ways but sex we disgust in the animalistic Failings detached from my will remove meaning from moments that haunt me still, Your hand leading mine to dance, erasing all fear Our laughter bringing forth insatiable glee and levity Lending Your sleeve to wipe away my ever-welling tears Excitement that bordered on mania as Our voices overlayed in a mutual symphony Sitting side by side, Your shoulder pressed into mine. A brash belief in a future as Our hands intertwined and faced the ever callous tide of time All lacking, all wastes For it didn’t lead to passion and unscrupulous desires of the flesh. For it remained unquestioned and chaste But if I could be so bold as to indulge in the warmth of your hand, to hold it to my heart to know you’ll never be beyond notion and be who makes your smile stretch ever wider To offer devotion all without true obligation tethering us together and wish for your company until death do us part. Could I consider that selfishness love?