To Kiss Life Or Death

I swear I cross a lover path to be a fool whom never loved, thus I stand with grace, for it was death I begged? Who would be so in sorrow to kiss life or death. Than I who stand the wonderer. For I have given no mind to neither. Does a man as I can not stand between the two. For together I slept and eaten and talked with the two and run mad to talk with myself! One would say I am crazy. But thus YAH or his son give ear to hear my prayers. Does I pray in vain cause they give no answer to me. To play parson with life cause I alone wish to live or make love to death cause I alone seek to die! To be born with this fire of love and hate cause I alone can not choose between the two! Was it I who forgot YAH and Yeshua or they who rejected me! How am I to know this deadly blow for in early written I say they do not speak to me any more? To live beyond time not our father, to suffer loneliness and not be given a moment in peace! Yes to be a soulless soul who was never born to love? I alone without YAH help seek to find what love is? And when I find it I shall not give no glory to him! May he cast my nothingness to hell! For I feel I shall find a better comforter there? Oh look at hell delight in my words has if it believe I am a lover of its? How wrong can it be! I am the shadow cast within the valley of the shadows that no shadows in the valley can see! What a cruel punishment from YAH who say I am all forgiven! As I see it man lies but YAH lies better? Now look at me with both your eyes to see a man who stir in his sleep for no rest nor peace can be found there? Go your way woman seek for yourself another man? For to love I be not he? And time I tell you this to end my speaking, I shall not kiss life nor death, I shall not kiss light nor darkness nor love or hate. Yet I shall wonder alone writing down each words that come to me freely, and if YAH and Yeshua do not like this, than so be it! good-bye to all my lovers, there no more heartache, there no more pain to joy, cause I swear by all those stars above.