Tickling a Funny Bone

Something new and exciting
At our all boys school
Today we're going diving 
At an open air swimming pool .

All the boys are bragging 
As we get on board the bus
Not an ounce of testosterone was flagging
In any one of us .

Into the changing room 
I look splendid in my trunks 
A fifteen year old shy buffoon
Thinking he looks like a hunk .

I'm standing in the shallow end 
Just the local beauty queen and me 
Shockwaves through my body she sends 
When she brushes past me accidentally .

Bumps in all the right places 
Where should I rest my eyes 
Blood rushing to my face 
As something in my trunks begins to rise .

Darren get out of the water 
It is time for us to dive 
Sir , Do I really have to ?
Let me stay until the other boys arrive .

Watson. Stop slouching 
Get your hands down by your side
She's grinning and pouting 
There's nowhere for me to hide .

Dazzling me with beauty 
but what she did was foul
She stopped right in front of me 
You should see where she hung her towel.

My suffering wasn't wasted
The other guys with jealousy were sick
When she kissed me on the cheek and said 
''See ya later donkey dick .

If you were the girl that told me that 
Might I give you a warning 
My ex has seen the thing you were looking at 
and says you need to get your eyes checked in the morning. 

2/3/14
Copyright © | Year Posted 2014

Poem

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A   Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 1:12 AM
Awesome Darren, thanks for the smiles... Linda
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:25 PM
Thank you Linda, If it made you smile, I really am a winner.
Smith Avatar
March 22, 2014 at 10:20 PM
Congrats my friend
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:26 PM
Thanks Tim , It was nice to get a mention.
A  Avatar
March 22, 2014 at 4:05 PM
Darren , This is a nice entry :)~ congratulations on your win. LOVE ~SKAT~
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:28 PM
Thanks SKAT, I am honoured to get a mention.
Dietrich Avatar
March 22, 2014 at 4:04 PM
Darren, I see you got an HM. I have to tell you. I just read half of the winners. For me, this one was the funniest!! congrats on your win.
Allison Avatar
March 26, 2014 at 6:38 AM
I have to agree Andrea - to me this was the funniest write it all boils down to sense of humour -my poem didnt get a mention so am delighted for Darren
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:30 PM
Humour is such a personal thing Andrea, I'm always happy if I manage to avoid offending.
Mehta Avatar
March 22, 2014 at 11:06 AM
Congratulations on the win . I appreciate the humor in the write, darren
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:31 PM
Thank you Dr , It was nice to get a mention.
Jerden Avatar
March 21, 2014 at 7:11 PM
Awesome! Well done! Congratulations!
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:33 PM
Thank you Roy , Delighted you enjoyed it.
Roberts Avatar
March 21, 2014 at 5:09 PM
congrats on your HM in the contest Darren and thanks for the support
Watson Avatar
March 23, 2014 at 2:35 PM
Thank You Francine , You are welcome and I am honoured to warrant a mention.
Smith Avatar
March 2, 2014 at 4:09 PM
Where do you come up with these stories..lol
Watson Avatar
March 3, 2014 at 3:59 AM
My imagination Tim , lol
Allison Avatar
March 2, 2014 at 3:19 PM
hilarious write Darren had me chuckling from start to finish Jan x
Watson Avatar
March 3, 2014 at 3:58 AM
Thank you Jan if it gave you a giggle , The poem served its purpose , I'm delighted.
Dietrich Avatar
March 2, 2014 at 11:47 AM
hahahaha, the last line was killer!!! You are lucky the Soup police here did not come along and take your poem down using that one word. My friend got his poem yanked off for using the word pussy and he was actually referring to a cat. hahaha. this was great. I hope she will chuckle over it, at least those last two stanzas should make her LOL! btw, are you still this young kid or are you much older? I have no idea your age!!!
Watson Avatar
March 3, 2014 at 3:56 AM
Thank you Andrea . I'm 39 years old but 18 in my head , lol I try never to use bad language in front of a lady and the term I used is commonly used in my country . We also had a Mr Turpin , A highwayman of whom I'm sure you will have heard , The term I used was his first name ,
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