Thirtieth High School Reunion

We gathered for our thirtieth class reunion at Lydia's Smorgasbord.
I'd avoided such past events since in school I was largely ignored!
But my spouse proclaimed we would attend, thus ending that debate!
The dreaded encounter is expressed in verse below that I will now relate!

A social hour preceded the buffet where the booze freely flowed!
I looked about the room to see if I could spot anyone that I knowed.
I hardly recognized the campus queen - she had acquired a heap of weight!
That once haughty snob now tipped the scales, I judged, at one ninety-eight!

I saw the big-man-on-campus who was named most apt to score success.
He had a dearth of hair, an ample gut and an astonishing lack of finesse!
Some gal with purple hair staggered up to me and planted a slobbering kiss!
Must've been one of my old flames as I mused, "Now, who in hell is this!"

Guys gravitated my way boasting about this and that bending my ear.
They bored me with nasty jokes and trivia that I really didn't want to hear!
Of course I told all how great they looked, staring them dead in the eye,
And asking the Lord's forgiveness and crossed my fingers for telling such a lie!

The jocks were trying to impress one and all with their waning capabilities.
Most were hobbling about with canes discreetly masking their disabilities!
'Twas an interesting eve and the grub was great, of that there is no doubt,
But for our fortieth, fiftieth and sixtieth reunions, please include me out!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
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Copyright © | Year Posted 2012

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Caulfield Avatar
June 9, 2012 at 1:15 PM
This is a funny one. People outgrow their looks as they do their shoes. I just look back at certain ones I know and they have certainly ballooned enormously. Your poems are always so funny.
Collins Avatar
May 16, 2012 at 7:16 AM
I've had a lovely time reading your poetry today and will be back. Now to the reunion: I graduated fifty years ago and have missed them all. Why bring up old wounds? Oh it wasn't that bad, no football teams at The Ursuline School. love, Kathy
Breidenthal Avatar
May 11, 2012 at 1:30 PM
Awesome. I can't wait till my high school reunion. Perhaps I can write a poem about it when the time comes. This was a really marvelous write and very funny. Love your work! Your mind just spills smooth and unique lines. Always, Laura
D. Avatar
May 11, 2012 at 10:41 AM
you made laugh'
Williams Avatar
May 11, 2012 at 10:41 AM
Bob, bet you couldn't wait to leave, I like it, have a good weekend..Dave
Austin Avatar
May 11, 2012 at 9:30 AM
Love, it. I went to my 50th back in 1997. Unlike yourself, I had fun, but, like you say, the hot shots were pitiful. I haven't gone to a reunion since. One is quite enough. Lover, daver
Horsman Avatar
May 11, 2012 at 8:36 AM
Bloody hell Robert, this is exactly how i feel about these so called reunions, like most aspect in todays world, reunions are mostly to do with profit for someone, and has you write the jocks were right in there, doing their thing. brilliant this must go to my fav, along with you for the hundredth welcomed time, harry
Bauer Avatar
May 11, 2012 at 5:06 AM
this is a gem! i went to one high school reunion and you've really nailed how strange it is to see how people have changed. of course, your humor is what makes your poems so special and this is no exception!
Ball Avatar
May 10, 2012 at 6:15 PM
Thank you Robert for the comment on my recent work, my father also was in the USAF in World war 2 and Korea, I grew up on Air Force bases and my father along with my Father above is looking at what I might say and do, I usually don't mix politics with religion but enough is enough I'm tired of the Political correct in this country, God's laws are forever and that is it. God bless
Richards Avatar
May 10, 2012 at 5:17 PM
I agree, Bob.....I am one of the few who have avoided class reunions. I did have a wonderful high school experience, so I was lucky, but I have not wanted to tarnish my good memories by going back, for some reason. Sometimes it is best to leave well-enough alone. Great poem!!
Kendrick Avatar
May 10, 2012 at 4:47 PM
Interesting work..I am sure this one probably sums up what happens at most reunions..Enjoyed reading your humorous work..Sara
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