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They Are Back

red shining nectar
the hovering hummingbirds
woman sweeps the porch

©Donna Jones

Copyright © Donna Jones | Year Posted 2013

birdseasonshaiku

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September 29, 2018 at 9:52 PM

Short and sweet! I enjoyed this, Donna!

May 20, 2013 at 10:00 AM

The freshness of spring in your poem has a ring. The snow shovels hanging, my heart starts to sing.

May 15, 2013 at 9:47 PM

I love the atmosphere & setting here. I value the songbirds in the early morning sunrise. This is great!

May 15, 2013 at 11:45 AM

I've been trying to do the sweeping of the open carport this morn..I have to work a few minutes then rest because of my heart condition..Growing old is not for sissies..Enjoyed reading this creative work..Sara

May 15, 2013 at 3:39 PM

Thanks Sara ...I know what you mean...the garden work seems to be harder every year...I transplanted some iris..bulbs today now I'm calling it a day...

May 12, 2013 at 7:08 PM

A fine haiku. You did a great job of describing the action in an absolutely minimal space. A very rich piece... Jack

May 12, 2013 at 8:11 PM

Thanks so much jack...:-) very kind...

James Marshall Goff

May 12, 2013 at 5:01 AM

Donna, your kind words warm a frosty morn' here in Minnesota! Thank You! your twist here in line 3 is good....jimbo

May 12, 2013 at 6:45 AM

Thanks jimbo ..it just happened to be what was going on.so I wrote it that way..:-) have a good day

Andrea Dietrich

May 12, 2013 at 12:18 AM

Do you have other "Friends" that nest in your yard,Donna?

May 12, 2013 at 6:50 AM

Many! There have been birds of every color at the feeders lately...and living in the country I live with everything from skunks to deer, coyote, fox, cougar, andeverything in between.. Squirrels are really the mostfun to watch...you?

May 11, 2013 at 9:27 PM

Very nice. I like the powerful images in such a short piece. Very artistic

May 12, 2013 at 6:53 AM

Thank you Karen....

Eileen Manassian

May 11, 2013 at 12:22 PM

So lovely, MD. Can I come and visit! :) You rock! XOXOX Haiku...lovely like U!

Eileen Manassian

May 13, 2013 at 5:17 AM

Oh Donna...I don't know anything about these....humbly...I somehow don't dare write any anymore! You...my dear....you are soaring!

May 11, 2013 at 7:37 PM

Anytime....thank you...you helped teach me....I'm trying!

Ravi Sathasivam

May 11, 2013 at 6:49 AM

Excellent. Beautiful haiku. Enjoyed. Tfs

May 11, 2013 at 7:38 PM

I so appreciate this...thank you...

Andrea Dietrich

May 11, 2013 at 12:18 AM

oh it is great that they are back. And to make a poem like this one about it!!! I am waiting for my little swallows to reappear as well!!

May 11, 2013 at 7:59 PM

Thanks Andrea...hope your friends return soon....have a..great day....:-)

Richard Lamoureux

May 10, 2013 at 6:36 PM

I am least skilled at Haiku so I am a great admirer of a beauty like this one.

May 10, 2013 at 9:08 PM

Oh thanks Richard ..as you well know I am very new to them...:-)

May 10, 2013 at 4:40 PM

I WOULD NOT KNOW WHERE TO START HERE BUT WELL PUT THANKS FOR COMENTS ON MINE YOU HAVE SOUP XX DAVIDSCTT

May 10, 2013 at 9:09 PM

Thanks so much David...

Connie Gildersleeve

May 10, 2013 at 3:37 PM

Donna this a super Haiku. The third line is fabulous. My hardest line when I'm writing a Haiku. I love it. I'm putting it in my favorite. Warm Smile, Connie

May 10, 2013 at 9:11 PM

What an honor Connie...thanks...I was sweeping my porch being swarmed by the hummingbirds I feed wheninspired...:-)

May 9, 2013 at 9:32 PM

Wow, Donna! I am impressed by how well you are getting the hang of this. Line three is supposed to be the "u-turn" in your haiku, yet at the same time feel natural. I've heard some call haiku "the poetry of nouns" and you seem to get that as well. There is more power in simplicity, and to observe the things around you. Look forward to more!

May 10, 2013 at 9:12 PM

You are just the sweetest guy....thanks....

May 9, 2013 at 7:23 PM

I enjoyed your poem Donna...beautiful imagery...hugs

May 10, 2013 at 9:14 PM

Im smiling Joseph...thanks....

Anne-Lise Andresen

May 9, 2013 at 3:04 PM

- Well written Donna! - oxox / / Anne-Lise :)

May 9, 2013 at 4:35 PM

Thanks Anne Lise...

May 9, 2013 at 1:26 PM

Is that you on the porch?...I'll bet it is. Love this haiku, Donna

May 9, 2013 at 4:37 PM

Yep...it's me...and these crazy guys would rather fight than eat! Dive bombing around my head while I try to sweep the porch...some gratitude for feeding them...ha!

May 9, 2013 at 8:33 AM

"hovering hummingbirds" I can just picture it in my mind! You've got this haiku thing down pat my friend! Love ya dear Donna... hugs xoxox

May 9, 2013 at 4:45 PM

Hey Jack....yeah...just like little helicopters!!! Crazy little guys...like to fight...there are six places to eat at the feeder and they spend all their time fighting for one!..thanks for the nice word....still trying...

May 9, 2013 at 1:27 AM

So spot on, donna... birds are lovely until they scatter their dirt, lol... shimmering 'ku.. so creative!..:) huggs

May 9, 2013 at 4:46 PM

Thank you so much nette .....:-)

May 8, 2013 at 7:54 PM

ha ha, yes this is all too true with the presence of birds! They are, however, mighty birds these hummingbirds! These birds are beautiful, as is your poem, quite the glorious piece, Great Work!!

May 9, 2013 at 4:48 PM

As always, so nice to see your smile and know I have a nice word from you...thanks Russell.

May 8, 2013 at 5:34 PM

I see you have mastered the art of the Haiku as well (Where will it all end?) Lovely alliteration in the second line and the last line really sweeps me off my feet...Ow! I think I bruised my elbow! (Sorry, couldn't resist and please don't swat me with that broom) - Tim

May 8, 2013 at 6:45 PM

Don't worry...its my only mode of transportation..hahaha....wouldn't want to damage it!!!!..and thanks for the constructive criticism!!! I really need this help from my friends...I'm just learning!!! I went back and changed all five of my haiku...all big 5..woopie!!!!

May 8, 2013 at 5:39 PM

No capitalization required...Adds to the effect (Ouch!)

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