The Uninviting Feeling

I'm not at all innocent...when you make me hurt inside I'm getting over you...but I'm not giving up completely, though you are not present in my life It rips my high hopes into shreds of worthlessness I will never be the one who has a tainted soul, devouring lies My heart is full of lament - you beg to differ... I wouldn't have the guts to bid you a farewell Don't take from me my happiness, you invaded my personal bubble I'd rather be with someone else who has love abiding in their heart I don't understand love at such a young age...besides, I'm not ready for such a big commitment Anyone could say that they adore me, but I won't treasure it -------------------------------- I know that you'll ignore my calls of relief, I'm screaming out loud, so listen right this instance You're digging too deep; my smile embraces a frown My dreams are failing me now, What am I supposed to do? What do you think you are? The queen of the Earth? I pray for true love to lead me to a pleasant place... I didn't expect being in a situation like this... This is not how I planned things out This uninviting feeling took me by surprise Time is running out, I got to keep on track I'm weak and fragile... Do not hunt me down again, predator - you are so vile... I saw you flee outside - you were as high as a kite It made me lose all confidence All of this commotion doesn't make sense Your eyes, your deceiving lies - they spew out fire Your lips, your chapped lips - they project a liar Unconditional hatred sets me on fire I can tell that I'm not stronger than I realize, But you gottah know that I'm not alone 'cause He looks after me Did you forget the evenings that you and I cherished so much with each other? Do you even care if I end up drowning in agony? All I have to do is rely on the Lord because without him, I'm nothing It's painful to see you harming yourself again It's hard to accept the past and the truth behind it I'm penniless because of you and your lack of affection Our time was up, I can't help but cry aloud I need you to look at me; I know that I'm not that good looking Hold on to faith and hope... We depart from our peaceful states I gave in to your pity, now I'm thinking and acting like a fool It figures that you're gone and I'm left alone - Shards of me crash unto the floor -------------------------------- I know that you'll not support in this time of tribulation I'm whispering to you, so listen right very carefully You're pushing my limits; my smile embraces a frown My nightmares are ganging up on me now, What am I supposed to prepare for? What do you want from me? You won't earn back my trust... I pray for true love to lead me to a sacred haven I didn't expect being in a dangerous dilemma This is not how I imagined things to unfold... This uninviting feeling took me by surprise Peace is running out, I got to fight for it more and more I'm weak and fragile...growing sore Do not hunt me down again, big bad wolf - you are so hardcore I saw you sprint outside - you were as aggressive as a hawk It made me lose all strength All of this commotion increased by the minute... Your eyes, your deceiving eyes - they spew out fire Your lips, your chapped lips - they unveil a liar Unfeeling passion sets me aflame I can tell that I'm not stronger than I realize, But you gottah know that I'm not alone 'cause He looks after me How come I'm scared out of the blue? Will there be an end to violence? Why do I feel cold when you pass by me, yet you still as warm as a blanket? I don't want to make things look too difficult to solve I convinced myself that I don't have the hearts for you...but denying it will not get me somewhere safe I can't face the fact that our love is blinding Turn the other way, I'm so ashamed I'm longing for change...I'm trying to not come across as insane I took another mysterious lane, But it's no big deal... My wounds deep inside will heal You'll notice that you have nothing to gain Your eyes, your deceiving eyes - they spew out fire Your lips, your chapped lips - they sound like a liar Today seems hard to rebuild hope This fearfulness overwhelmed me You ditched me and I preyed upon distress You deleted my progress... Right now, it felt like I've fell right into a hideous mess My life was so meaningless all along... I beg for significance to enlighten my self- destructive spirit Before I collide into the abyss