Notes About The Poem

Originally published: 20th April 2022

Image: Ahmad Tello from Pixabay


The Sun In the Square

one waiter
ten tables
a sunshade and chair

a small cup
strong coffee
the sun in the square.

the fountain
a church door
the white heat and glare

graffitti
neat flowers
the sun in the square.

a slight breeze
a pigeon
a clock chime somewhere

a small dish
one euro
the sun in the square.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2022

Poem

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Kendrick Avatar
March 27, 2025 at 4:36 AM
Way to go with this winner. It got it just right. Congratulations. I really like this one, Gary. I like the rhythm, rhyme and flow. Sara K
Radice Avatar
March 27, 2025 at 10:35 PM
Thanks Sara. I enjoyed writing this poem so I'm glad you like it. Cheers - pGary
Ashley Avatar
February 6, 2023 at 8:36 AM
Dear Gary, I adore the syllable structure for a crisp cadence and the monorhyme rhyme scheme. Your gifted pen captures the charming village scene with vivid, intimate and potent brevity. The magic of your strong imagery easily brings me to the center of this lovely scene. Congratulations for your excellent win in Brian's contest. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Radice Avatar
March 20, 2023 at 11:29 PM
Hi Susan. Apologies - I've just come across your wonderful words today. Not sure how I missed them until now. Thanks so much for your continued support. Cheers - Gary
Andresen Avatar
February 4, 2023 at 11:07 AM
- A lovely place to enjoy a cup of coffee - Congratulations on your win, Gary :) - hugs
Radice Avatar
February 5, 2023 at 12:16 PM
It was Anne-Lise. It was a lovely cup of coffee too. :) Cheers - Gary
Canerdy Avatar
February 4, 2023 at 10:19 AM
A huge CONGRATS on your well-deserved win, Gary~~great descriptions! Janice
Radice Avatar
February 5, 2023 at 12:15 PM
Thanks Janice! It was written in just one of those moments and the descriptions wrote themselves. Cheers - Gary
Sambourne Avatar
April 30, 2022 at 8:17 PM
There is power in brevity. Your piece is image strong and speaks to village serenity + its charity. Congratulations! Brian
Radice Avatar
May 1, 2022 at 2:03 AM
Thanks Brian. Appreciated. Yes, that old addage that 'less is more' certainly applies to this poem. It sounds cliched but this is one of those poems that wrote itself. The lines were all around me. Cheers - Gary
John Avatar
April 23, 2022 at 2:41 AM
Lovely description, G. Enjoyed this.
Radice Avatar
April 23, 2022 at 4:01 AM
Thank you Andrew. Cheers - Gary
Lawrence Avatar
April 22, 2022 at 7:17 PM
Gary, So visual … descriptive of a place and time . A slice of reality . A moment in the sunlight . Love it ! Strong coffee too ! Cheers, Susan :)
Radice Avatar
April 23, 2022 at 1:14 AM
Hi Susan. Yes..always strong coffee :) Cheers - Gary
Dietrich Avatar
April 22, 2022 at 4:08 PM
oh wow, I love this poetry style. I need to remember this form you used. Maybe do a contest one day using it!!
Radice Avatar
April 23, 2022 at 1:17 AM
Thanks Andrea. The poem was originally going to be called "Notes on a Napkin" - That sums up the form to me :) Cheers - Gary
Daniel Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 4:14 AM
I like this style, a kind of impromptu verse, Gary, awesome writing:)
Radice Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 9:43 AM
Thanks Jo. This was a one off poem in regards to its style but I like the way this form can describe so much in so few words. Due to all the excellent feedback I may now attempt to write another poem in the same style again. Cheers - Gary
Boles Avatar
April 20, 2022 at 2:42 PM
Reminiscent of my awesome wanderings and coffee treks ending up at charming sidewalk cafes all over Europe. It's a quaint picture you painted here which brought back fond memories Gary! Thanks...ab
Radice Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 3:18 AM
Hi Anselmo Thank you for your lovely comments. Cheers - Gary
Kauffman Avatar
April 20, 2022 at 9:44 AM
Gary, I feel like I have just seen a travelogue of Spain, Italy or Greece! This is like a peaceful morning at a sidewalk cafe. The simplicity and clean expression in your lines really highlights that sense of serenity. Lovely poem! Thanks for posting!
Radice Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 3:16 AM
Hi Sam - Thank you. Yes, serenity. Some other place. Some other world. Some other time. Cheers and read you soon. Gary
Cunningham Avatar
April 20, 2022 at 9:08 AM
You paint a very tranquil scene with your words Gary, hope you are keeping well. Tom
Radice Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 3:12 AM
Hi Tom. It was a very tranquil, hot day. How on earth the locals could go about their business in suits and not look hot just beggars belief. Cheers - Gary
Kyser Avatar
April 20, 2022 at 8:19 AM
I like much // what you did // in that poem there..
Radice Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 3:10 AM
Hi Jeff :) Thanks so much for your comments. The poem is a little different in style to what I usually attempt so I'm glad you like it. Cheers - Gary
Hankins Avatar
April 20, 2022 at 7:46 AM
Simple and simply beautiful. It reminded me so much of sitting at an outdoor cafe in Paris close to the opera house. Thanks, Gary. Nice writing.
Radice Avatar
April 21, 2022 at 3:08 AM
Thanks Milt. Yes! Appreciated. I'm glad you state 'simple' because that's exactly what I wanted from the poem - The form helped me to remember what I observed from an outside cafe seat on a very hot day in Kotor, Montenegro and helped give the poem some atmosphere Cheers - Gary
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