The Oomer Boomer

In the long grass on the island of Toomer , lives a great big bird called the oomer boomer. Now this bird is not like any partridge or pheasant, on the whole the boomer is really quite pleasant. It’s beak is quite long, and it’s wings are quite tiny, and his claws are long and all skinny and spiny. But the weirdest thing about this bird, is a noise like something you’ve never heard. For as the sun rises into the sky, the bird awakes and gives a big sigh. Then the oomer positions itself on a ledge, with its bum pointing upwards, and its head in the hedge. Then it takes a deep breath before it starts, and proceeds to let out a massive great fart. The fallout from this is felt all over toomer, thank goodness that there’s only one oomer boomer.