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The Observer

I see you from a distance Silently you cry as your heart is crushed by indiscretion You scream out from within to be free Loyalty and desire hold you captive Fear engulfs and strangles you He loves you or does he? Are his words enough without the emotions? You seek comfort and fulfillment only to remain empty Longing surrounds you like chains Binding you to him Passion and love are what you seek Trust is lost and you rely on instinct Begging and feeling a loss of dignity you continue on Your relationship hanging by a thread I watch, I observe, and I listen I see you and your reflection; your soul I watch as you fall to your knees to pray I listen and hear the words repeating I conclude that you are me Copyright © 2009 Lena “Lolita” Townsend

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Colin Mitchell Williams

Date: 5/9/2009 8:11:00 AM

... terrific... !!!!! Bravo Lolita Bravo !

Brian Anderson

Date: 5/9/2009 4:53:00 AM

wow! that's all i got. wow!

Carolyn Devonshire

Date: 5/6/2009 9:49:00 AM

Wow, Lolita, that last line was quite a twist! Before I came to it, I was thinking words would not be "enough without emotions." The chains -- being a prisoner of love -- are experienced by many. You certainly make the reader go back and read again after contemplating the tremendous impact of the last line. Awesome! Love, Carolyn

James Marshall Goff

Date: 5/6/2009 4:20:00 AM

Lena, really fun, the line"you rely on instinct" The reader can feel that transformation in your poem....and then the great twist at the end puts the whole poem that you thought was an observation of another, was actually an almost OBE (outerbody exp...) cool!!!! and thanks for comments!! Jim

James Peranteau

Date: 5/6/2009 2:50:00 AM

Lolita,...this was a powerful write,..not only for those who have suffered this anguish,..but for those who hide from their infliction to cause this cry!!!! ty for this write,..and your kind comments...james

Shirin Neshat

Date: 5/5/2009 9:52:00 PM

Strong use of words and good descriptive of feelings.

Brian Strand

Date: 5/5/2009 11:13:00 AM

Like the enigma in this write Lolita.Rgds Brian & thanks for your welcome comments

David Smalling

Date: 5/4/2009 4:47:00 AM

We have so much insight after the fact ... every poemopens the eyes wider to see ... thanks for all you show and the beauty of it.

Sharon Winter

Date: 5/3/2009 12:13:00 PM

A surprise ending for me. An excellent write. We all go through such trying times. Slowly coming back to the soup, sorry for what I have missed. Love, Shar

Carrie Richards

Date: 5/3/2009 7:15:00 AM

You describe a relationship that many will recognize. Well done, Lena. ~ Carrie

Raul Moreno

Date: 5/3/2009 12:18:00 AM

"Are his words enough without the emotions?" Beautiful line with a strong, compelling ending. Great job, one for my fav's...Raul

Christopher Higgins

Date: 5/2/2009 7:58:00 PM

This is awesome because the ending was not what I was expecting..it is like looking in a mirror and finally realizing that the one in pain is you...love this.