The Needle Barely Moves
Man weds cockroach in church ceremony
Guests munch on freshly grilled abalone
Pastor upholds his sworn duty
Lectures bride and groom on infidelity
Barely two months into marriage
Tiny baby cockroach appears in a carriage
Headlines shout out the bad news
Seems Mrs. Cockroach was groped and abused
Minister contacted Planned Parenthood
Lacking precedent, post-full-term abortion approved
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