The Loop
(This is my first poem about myself, please comment.)
I wake up every single day
telling myself everything is okay.
I laugh, joke and smile
but that will only last a while.
Then I get home, and take off the mask
in a feeling of self identity i long to bask.
Everything I do is just a distraction
because i know i'll never have any self-satisfaction
As I lay down alone in my room alone
a i can wish is that i have a clone.
Maybe they can live a better life
where they don't end everyday with a knife.
The clock goes off so i put the mask on again
I look in the mirror and see a woman,
I'm sure that's what everyone can see
but that's not who I'm supposed to be.
I smile, laugh and joke
it makes me want to choke
No, what I said was a lie
It makes me want to die.
My life is just like a clock
rewinding everyday, tic-tock
and again I walk down the same path
which always ends in a bloodbath.
I keep telling myself to go a different route
but I don't and it makes me want to shout.
Day after day I go back there,
How much more must I bear?
Today is the day I finally learned.
At that corner is where I turned.
In the end there is no bloodshed,
so maybe i won't end up dead.
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