The List of Logic

I dream up answers as I choose a mind I spend decay and then I pay for time Puzzling to think I could resist To pick an end and add it to the list One more day and then one more excuse Two more times in case I am confused Frightening to think I need some life Some more denial and an enterprise I want a reason to believe in truth But being alone still tends to disapprove Puzzling instincts hiding in their hate All around me as they procreate Now I see that it was always lies All dishonesty that was being justified Frightening to think that I’m alone Adapting on and turning into stone So much nothing and then so much pain Buzzing like insects as I go insane Logical to say I should resist An honest ending to an endless list