The Infection
That first look, that first connection
It sticks in your head
Creates a home in your memory;
Imagination running wild
Replaying the same moment over and over again;
That feeling in your stomach getting more intense by the second
The blood pumping through your veins
This is what you feel every time you see him
The connection becomes something, it becomes reality
It turns into an everyday thing, a thing that fills your heart
It turns into a comfortable feeling, that connection;
Those butterflies reappearing every time you glance at him
Or even think of him…hoping that he feels those butterflies too
Time goes on, every moment is being cherished even if it is
Just a moment; just a moment is what he feels
Thats all he is convinced of, of what this is
It takes a turn, he lies
He creates stories; those butterflies are still there
They turn into a pit in your stomach
A pit full of doubt and horror
He disappears
Comes back
A constant disappointment
A constant fear
It stops at a halt
The fear dissipates
The clouds are gone
Wait its back;
The butterflies, the fear, the pain, the happiness
Its all back
Becoming a torturing feeling, a constant pain
Not being able to get away from it
The want, the hope, creeping its way back in
Nestling itself in your heart
He’s using you, and you know it
But the heart wants what it wants
You can’t get away from it
It’s an infection
An infection that has no cure;
But all that you feel is want and hope
Hope that it will work out in the end
Hope that he’ll realize his mistakes
But he won’t,
And he never will
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