The Infection

That first look, that first connection It sticks in your head Creates a home in your memory; Imagination running wild Replaying the same moment over and over again; That feeling in your stomach getting more intense by the second The blood pumping through your veins This is what you feel every time you see him The connection becomes something, it becomes reality It turns into an everyday thing, a thing that fills your heart It turns into a comfortable feeling, that connection; Those butterflies reappearing every time you glance at him Or even think of him…hoping that he feels those butterflies too Time goes on, every moment is being cherished even if it is Just a moment; just a moment is what he feels Thats all he is convinced of, of what this is It takes a turn, he lies He creates stories; those butterflies are still there They turn into a pit in your stomach A pit full of doubt and horror He disappears Comes back A constant disappointment A constant fear It stops at a halt The fear dissipates The clouds are gone Wait its back; The butterflies, the fear, the pain, the happiness Its all back Becoming a torturing feeling, a constant pain Not being able to get away from it The want, the hope, creeping its way back in Nestling itself in your heart He’s using you, and you know it But the heart wants what it wants You can’t get away from it It’s an infection An infection that has no cure; But all that you feel is want and hope Hope that it will work out in the end Hope that he’ll realize his mistakes But he won’t, And he never will