Notes About The Poem

Credit Image:depositphotos.com

The Great Witches Bake Off

The Great Witches Bake Off is here again
Bakes so weird some have no name.
So fierce it was to be the winner,
The prize is fame, on Lucifer's underworld twitter.
Laughing and cackling but alert and suspicious
Each convinced their bake, unique and delicious.

Erin was making a blood drizzle cake
Three pints of pigs blood is what it would take.
Weevils were left in that thrived in the flour
Add three rancid eggs for a flesh rotting aroma.
Sprinkles of gun powder to help make it rise
But don't breath it in for your eyes would triple in size.

Val was attempting bubble and squeak pie
Every mouse could be heard, that is no lie.
A bubble collection of freezed dried frog spawn
Mix in some feathers from a unwilling white swan.
A few bunches of hemlock, carrots, turnips and greens
The poison so hot, you could hear screams from your spleen.

Wilma was busy stuffing a dozen bat heads,
With slivers of blood veins torn into threads.
Bat crumble with a topping of air fried bat legs,
Which gives a harsh crunch and a gross looking sealed edge.
Served with a dollop of deadly nightshade ice-cream
So potent you would hallucinate kindness in dreams.

Fairy cakes were made by cousin Nell,
Who was expelled when she was caught casting a spell.
The wings of dead fairies placed on top of her bakes,
Escaped out the window exposing her cheating mistake.
She cursed, swore revenge as she was escorted out
A witch trial there be, there be no doubt.

Who did win? who claimed the prize? 
It was Maggie the cat with her eye-spy-berry surprise.
For Frankie Stein Horner had hid in a dark corner,
As Maggies assistant and back stabbing informer.
Their deal was a lifetime of pies, for that was his dream
As Maggie quietly purred whilst licking her got cream.

                        18.10.24
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Hamill Avatar
November 7, 2024 at 1:31 AM
great witches bake off, only one thing missing, nice chunk of smelly stilton, so that`s where all my blood is going, LOL take care, simon. :-)
James Avatar
November 7, 2024 at 9:32 AM
Yuk! at stilton, but maybe for next time lol. Emilia : )
Goldsmith Avatar
October 24, 2024 at 2:01 PM
What a fun write/picture. Maybe you should get this on the TV. Hahaha!!! I wish you would write more... Have a fun day   write away.....................
James Avatar
October 26, 2024 at 3:26 AM
Thank you so much Paula. There is a programme called the Great British Bake Off. I did a witches version with their own ideas on ingredients lol. I am happy that you enjoyed it. Hope you have a great weekend. Emilia : )
Rodgers Avatar
October 23, 2024 at 6:56 AM
Dear Emilia, I am glad I came to the great Witch's bake off! I loved the macabre baking contest with grotesque ingredients and sinister concoctions. I will have some of the blood drizzle cake to stuffed bat heads. LOL! Autumn Blessings, My Dear Friend, Daniel
James Avatar
October 24, 2024 at 2:51 AM
Thank you so much Daniel, it is lovely to meet you. I have put aside a sample of each for you to try lol. Blessings to you too. Emilia : )
Crandall Avatar
October 21, 2024 at 9:47 PM
Very entertaining poem, Emilia! With competition like that, I think they all should be award a prize. Weevils, mice, bat heads, dead fairy wing, mm-mm, sounds delicious!
James Avatar
October 24, 2024 at 2:39 AM
Thank you so much David. I've got the cauldron simmering, so could make you up a batch of each lol. Emilia : )
Jayasankar Avatar
October 21, 2024 at 1:18 AM
Such a wonderful creative write dear Emilia. Enjoyed reading. ~ Ani
James Avatar
October 23, 2024 at 12:34 PM
Thank you so much Ani. Is lovely to see you again. Emilia : )
One Avatar
October 19, 2024 at 6:25 AM
Hi Emilia.. Your poem is a delightful, dark parody that combines elements of witchcraft, humor, and competitive baking. Through vivid imagery, clever wordplay, and a surprising twist, it offers a fun, macabre take on the theme of rivalry, all while keeping the tone light and amusing.
James Avatar
October 20, 2024 at 3:07 AM
Hi SO and thank you so very much. What a wonderful and detailed comment you have given. I wrote a poem back in 2021 called Taste of Halloween which is another food related theme on halloween. I am very happy that you enjoyed it. Thank you again. Emilia : )
M  Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 11:07 PM
Hi Emilia…..a wonderfully creative and captivating tale my friend. Love it! Hope all is well…lDebx
James Avatar
October 20, 2024 at 3:04 AM
Hi Deb and thank you so much. I am glad that you enjoyed it dear friend and hope you have been keeping well. Emilia : )
Cunningham Avatar
October 18, 2024 at 10:55 PM
Brilliant Emilia, enjoyed your story. Hope you're keeping well.. Tom
James Avatar
October 20, 2024 at 3:00 AM
Thank you so much Tom. I am happy that you enjoyed it. Hope you have been keeping well. Emilia : )
Get a Premium Membership
Turn off ads, get more exposure for your poetry, and get more features with a Premium Membership.
Book: Diverse Voices: The Poetry of Human Rights and the Pursuit of Peace