Notes About The Poem
This is the first time I have reposted a poem on soup but with it being 'Pancake Day' I couldnt resist a little cheeky humour. This poem is taken from my first book 'A giggle a day can chase the blues away which is available on Amazon - the purchase code is B0CSPRKG6P 02/12/26
THE GREAT BRITISH PANCAKE DAY TOSS OFF - warning contains Innuendo!
Today is Pancake Day and there’s to be a pancake race
folk are on the starting line with a smile upon their face
Ted is ready with his frying pan, he is a fat old josser
but when it comes to pancakes, Ted’s an expert tosser.
He paces around anxiously and old Ted can’t resist
Getting in some practice with a quick flick of his wrist
Fresh pancakes get delivered by Terry who’s the boss
He’ll raise the starting pistol; Ted’s dying to have a toss
The gun goes BANG and off they go, Ted’s busy tossing away
busty Maureen's in the lead, if she wins there’ll be hell to pay!
Ted’s won the race the last five years, he tosses night and day
He’s had the trophy on his shelf and hopes that’s where it’ll stay
Maureen stumbles, her pancake drops and she begins to cry
Ted sneakily stamps on her pancake; he’s such a crafty guy
The finishing line is in sight, there’s just fifty yards to go
Ted frantically tosses his pancake, his wrist is fast not slow
Bill makes a sterling effort and comes at Ted from behind
tossing their pans in unison; Bill's got winning on his mind
Ted lunges for the white tape, but the race is declared a draw
Bill suggests a ‘toss off’ as there’s never been a draw before
Both men take a breather and get a fresh pancake to toss
if either drops their pancake then it will be to their loss
They both stand on the finish line and flip and toss like mad
neither of them will concede, whoever loses will be quite sad
A crowd gathers, eager to know who’ll be crowned the winner
suddenly a seagull swoops and grabs Ted’s pancake for its dinner
He starts to shout, he’s quite irate when it’s declared Bill's won
Ted takes it all too seriously, but Bill declared the toss off fun!
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