The End Or the Beginning

Today’s a day to keep in mind when looking back but not behind Some doors I’ve closed but not yet locked as I can’t forget what I once thought rocked There are still some loved ones I wish weren’t out there, I only hope they know I care It didn’t take long before I did see that in the last year I forgot about me The sex, the drugs, the need to belong allowed me to make choices I once thought to be wrong My life had become a lot like a game; each turn seemed to change but the outcome the same See it never really mattered who I welcomed to play because deep down inside I knew not one of them would stay I didn’t fit in and I never caught on that there’s no room in this game for one little pawn We are used and abused but willingly so because deep down inside we’re feeling so low I allowed my life to be up for grabs with all at my back allowing the stabs She tried to beat me and he aimed to hurt me, I fought her back but he won you see When I got too tired to stay awake he saw an advantage he just had to take I barely came to when he was just about done this time I had lost and he thought he had won But he’ll remain in my mind as the tables get turned and when that day comes I’ll watch him get burned See as the rest of the world goes down for a sleep I avoid losing consciousness thanks to that creep So now here I sit where I sat at the start of a life I should’ve never been a part But I’ll never forget all the lessons I learned and I gained some relationships I definitely earned So now as I lay here I ponder the past I hope it allows me to make a new good thing last This road I found to self destruction has become the start of a new life including my mom Good bye and take care as soon you will know where you stand with those people whose true colors will show The end or the beginning is presented right here, to remember the struggle but discard the fear.