The Duck
If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck
It might be my mother-in-law
She was sitting stark naked in the garden tub
The scariest thing I ever saw
It was late one night when I got out of bed
'Cause I had to go visit the throne
I heard some splashing then my feet got wet
And I knew that I wasn't alone
Without her glasses she can't see a thing
So she asked me to shave her back
She must of been thinking that I was my wife
But all I could hear was quack
That poor rubber duck will never be the same
Who knows where that thing's been
I was thinking to my self he's going to hell
Just for floating in a tub full of sin
Well the very next day I shot that duck
For the evil things he did
So if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck
You better keep your bath toys hid
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